Ten Haunted Teacakes

This poem was inspired by the commercialism of supermarkets. I found a packet of "10 Haunted Tea Cakes" in my local supermarket and was wondering how much they could try and make anything holiday related! Little was I to know the true chilling tale....

'Ten haunted teacakes'
The supermarket packet read.
"But how can teacakes be haunted?"
My little boy said.

You haven't heard the story?
Of how, one dark Halloween night,
Ten little teacakes
Caused such a fright?

Forget the ghouls and goblins,
This is a far more chilling tale.
Those ten tiny teacakes
Will make you weep and wail.

So only if you sit up straight
And promise to be brave,
Will I tell you how those teacakes,
Taught a similar boy to behave....

It was a dark Halloween night,
And Tommy was stuck at home;
He thought himself too old for a sitter,
So he was all alone.

When, down in the kitchen,
He heard a curious sound;
So downstairs he decided to go
To have a look around.

And there, on the table,
He found an amazing sight:
A packet of teacakes,
All shiny and bright.

Although he had never
Seen them there before,
He ripped off the packaging
And threw it on the floor.

IIt was not very long
Till the packet was bare,
Tommy's stomach was full
And crumbs were in his hair.

So off to bed he went,
Tired out from such a feast;
But this was not the end.
Oh not to say the least!

For as he lay down
And started to dream,
From deep inside his stomach
He heard a terrible scream.

"This murder of us teacakes
Has gone on long enough.
You think we don't have feelings;
It's time to get tough!"

His mouth popped wide open,
With shock and with fright,
And whilst he was gaping
There came the strangest sight.

Those ten little teacakes
Burst up through his throat,
Jumped onto the floor
And started to bloat.

IIt wasn't too long
Till they were six foot three,
And seemed to be looking
Rather hungry.

"I'll eat his toes."
"And I'll eat his head."
"Then we'll be the ones
In the nice warm bed."

Quickly, one by one,
They each assigned a part;
The final teacake choosing
His rapidly beating heart.

They slowly surrounded Tommy
Leaving him nothing to do but scream
And that's when he woke up
Thinking it was just a dream.

But there, by his bed,
A teacake packet lay.
A packet that remains unopened
To this very day.

Tommy learned his lesson
About eating too much food;
Pigging out on cakes and chocolates,
Is more than just rude.

Which is why I tell this story
Before we reach Halloween night,
In case those ten haunted teacakes
Choose to give you a fright.

Enjoy the celebrations
But be careful of the sweets,
They can bring new meaning
To the phrase "Trick or treats."

© Copyright 2002 Andrea (UN: astephenson at Writing.Com). All rights reserved.
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