I couldn't live without my girls.

As I reflect back on my life before I had children, those days before constant stress and sleep deprivation set in, there are a few good memories. Times of freedom, and a sense of choice and control over my time and life. Of course it was fun to just pick up and go when I wanted, but you know what? The number of times I actually did, you could count on the fingers of one hand.

The overwhelming majority of my after work and weekend time was spent bored, lonely, and wishing and praying for more in my life. I had no idea of the amazing life that was awaiting me, just around the corner.

After years of debate, the hubby and I finally agreed, and produced our first child, a daughter. Suddenly, not only can I not imagine life without her, but I had no idea what I did with all my time before. I just don't remember. It couldn't have been important, obviously.

Another daughter followed, five years later, and the greatest joy possible is the opportunity to relive all our wonderful experiences with the first one, a second chance at the most precious gift imaginable. It is even now, sometimes overwhelming, as I am stunned and amazed with the privilege of raising them both. I am not sure I am worthy, but I can say that I try. I try every day.


In stark contrast to my previous life, my personal time is now hysterically busy, escalating as the girls grow, and become involved in more things. There is school, friends, lessons, it never seems to end. It doesn't end. Thank the Lord. My life is now full, with goals, a purpose, and a clear reason for existence, where only fog lived before. I am focused, I am content. I look forward to each new day. This is the gift they have given me. I need them as much as they need me, but that is what makes a family. Together, we are so much more than we would be individually.


They are truly what I could not live without. They represent all my hopes and dreams for the future,all of my reconciliation with the past, my link to the heavens, and all the best that this earth has to offer. They are my girls, the reason I live.