The Socknapper

I'm always wondering why a sock disappears. It's never two that are gone, only one, and its mate is never to be found. Here's a poem I wrote that offers one explanation for this mystery.

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The Socknapper!

I looked in my drawers,

I searched and searched,

And you know what I found?

One of red, one of black,

One with stripes, one with plaid.

That’s when I knew,

Someone was stealing my woolies!

But they never took both;

They just took one.

“Why would they do that,”

I asked myself loudly.

The wall stared back,

Not a shrug, not a wink.

“This is war,” I said,

So I set up a fort.

At the foot of my bed,

My flashlight in hand,

Blanket on head,

I waited and watched.

In the middle of the night

When the stars flashed green,

I saw with my eyes the alien thief.

Green scales had he

From his head to his foot.

He reached in my drawer,

And stole one wooly red sock!

Then he flung himself high.

As if riding a wave

His long, slender toe

Peeking over my sock.

That sock took him up;

On his way to the sky,

But as he did loop-the-loop

He glanced down at me

Crouched at the foot of my bed.

“Thanks for the ride,”

He called to me there,

And flashed me a surfer’s "V."

Then I heard him cry out,

As he soared for the stars

“Have sock, let’s boogie!”

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