How To Cook A Chicken

How to cook a chicken...

First you spread the wings out wide,
Then you think of something that you can stuff inside.
You scratch your head and mutter:
"Perhaps a stick of butter?"

Then I suggest a carrot...

"A carrot?" you parrot,
But the lightbulb lights.
You smoothly set your sights
On the vegetable delights
That are hiding in your fridge.
The door you open wide...
Now what to stick inside
My kitchen table bride?
Celery, onions, bread crumbs
Pepper, salt...

Don't be dumb!

I said a stick of butter!
I don't think I stutter!
Now! Before it melts away...
Make that chicken swing and sway.
The butter firm and greasy,
It slips right in so easy,
Make me cluck, you crazy cock!
We'll do the rooster rock.
Henny Penny running round --
"I think the sky is falling down!
Lawdy! Lawdy! It's an earthquake!"
Make that kitchen table shake.
The oven's ready, nice and hot,
Oh, you found my special spot
That sets my heart a clucking.
Don't stop now, just keep...

What, Mom? Nothing's wrong!
I was just getting the chicken ready --
This old table's not too steady --
That's why it was bumping so.
Okay! Chicken's ready. Got to go!


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