How to Have Lots of Friends

What I think...

If you want to have lots of friends then you have to forget about disliking people. It's a two-way thing. You have to treat people the way you want them to treat you. That means you have to find something to like in everyone you meet and you have to overlook their annoying ways.

A lot of people think that it's good looks that attracts lots of friends. That's only true as far as it goes. The key word is "attracts". Yes, a good-looking person will attract other people to them. But what happens after the person meets them is another thing. Good-looking people can have bad personalities.

Most people are average in looks, but there are plenty of average people who have lots of friends.

IMPORTANT: The key thing that makes someone like someone else is giving them gifts. Not little wrapped up boxes of goodies, but gifts of attention. Never brush anyone off. Always give someone your full attention and always be thinking in the back of your mind, "What is some good quality this person has?" Whenever the opportunity comes up to mention the good qualities of the person, then mention them. And do it even when they are not around.

Never disrespect another person to anyone else. If you are talking to girl A and you bad-mouth girl B, then girl A will be thinking: And I wonder what she says about ME behind MY back?

Never fall into the trap of thinking that it's cool to scapegoat somebody, even if everyone else seems to be down on the scapegoat. If you want lots of friends, then you have to love everybody, the cool, the uncool, the clean, the unclean. It doesn't mean that you have to spend time associating with them. It just means that you act decently, you never put down anyone, and you respect everyone.

Once you have the reputation of being kind to everyone, then no one can hurt you, because if anyone tries to hurt you, then everyone else rises up and says, "How could you treat [insert your name here] that way when she is always so kind to everybody else?" Your friends will protect you.

Think of it this way: They are your people. People are your responsibility. Protect the people. Understand them. Love them. Overlook their mistakes. Help them become better (but don't preach at them, just set a good example)...

So I have to stop now because I am in danger of preaching. I just wanted to tell you my ideas.

But if I were to tell you something to do then here is something practical...

If you know someone who everyone in school likes, then observe them closely. Have they ever insulted you or anyone else? Do they give the gifts of attention? If you say hello to them do they smile and give you a good hello back? If you ask them something, do they take the time to give you a good answer?

Learn wherever you can. Everyone has something to teach you.