The Eternal Curse of AG Bell (1834-1922)

Ring-ring; ring-ring. “Stupid telephones,” I mumbled, postponing my plans to shampoo my hair. I hastily towelled myself and rushed out of the bathroom to pick up the telephone; towel loosely wrapped around my waist. Leaving a trail of wet footprints and water droplets on the floor, I made my way towards the phone as it urged me to hurry. Ring-ring; ring-ring.

Just as I was approaching it, the phone stopped ringing. Oh, the pointlessness of all my previous pursuits! “Ni ma de!” I cursed at the phone and the caller. Feeling that it was insufficient, I raised my hand and formed it into a rude sign. That did not help, so I lifted the other hand to slap two rude signs together at the phone. I felt a sense of accomplishment after that, but the towel around my waist started to fall. I tried to make a grab for the towel, but it had already fallen too low, and I nearly hit myself where it hurts most.

There I stood, completely naked in the hallway, still damp from my aborted shower, towel on the floor around me, facing a silent telephone. Even though no one else was around at the moment, I felt an intense pang of embarrassment and stupidity. I cursed a bit more at the situation, picked up the towel and waited for the caller to call back.

10 seconds of silence.

20 seconds of silence. I could hear my clock’s second hand ticking.

30 seconds of silence. A dog barked in the distance, three cars and a motorcycle had just passed by, but no call came.

“I’ll go back to my shower then,” I told myself and the silent telephone. I started off slowly, half expecting the caller to return the call. There was none, so I gradually returned to my normal walking pace. I removed my towel, stepped into the shower and restarted my stalled shower.

I’ve always had a preference for cold showers rather than warm, and today was no different. As the cool water gushed over me, it absorbed heat from my skin and the air, transporting me away from the hot weather around me. “Wonderful. Could never understand why some people install water heaters…”

Ring-ring; ring-ring.