No Control

Weary thoughts tread inside my mind as I close my eyes,
to be so tired, yet not able to sleep...
I hate these nights.
Where my dreams are my demons and my thoughts are all the more worse for me dreaming them.
In a world of suspended reality,
where my dreams and conciousness collide to absolutely blow my mind,
the sequence of thoughts flashing through my mind make me see that trying to distinguish one from the other is a futile attempt.
The confusion of not being able to think straight,
of being awake, but still asleep,
makes my body heat up and my hands clench.
trying to be able to do something.
This one small thing I could control,
the only thing that I could control,
wasn't going to let me control it.
Fully awake,
with no more thoughts to dream,
no more thoughts to think.
I close my eyes yet again,
for I am weary of having no control.