Blue Funk

I lie awake in the deep blues and soft creams
A long day, tucked in tight
Aching muscles, tight scalp, weary eyes
Requiem for consciousness undisturbed
In a funk
There seems little to ponder
As the cool sheets enswathe me
Although, there is you
I saw you passing on the staircase
Empty cup, muttering to yourself
I thought to stop you as your arm brushed mine
Yet felt my limbs become as dense as lead
Fearful to tread in your hermitic realm
I cower to the wall and let you pass
Watch as you ascend oblivious
Wondering if you remember my name
How to say it in your libidinous way
Where is the wistful lover?
Round the corner, you become soft footsteps
Growing faint, light dies
I hear the creaks and groans of timeworn floors
The lilt and cadence of strings and drums
Wafting down to me, stinging my ears
My trumpet’s lament is soft and taciturn
You do not hear
I grip onto my paint brush
I use very gentle strokes
The vibrant reds and yellows scream and shriek
You turn your head in your complacent way
What did it look like to you?
Shall I clamour loudly? Clout your face?
Frustration bubbling high, ready to spill over
Foam burbling dangerous
It will ruin the element
So I turn myself down, and simmer
I listen to you breathe
I strain to hear you blink
My expressions never clearly illustrate
The spectrum within
Hesitant to pick up another tool
Spent from all my efforts
To be heard, seen and felt
Understood
I am worth this, but am for now
Worn out like the floors
I roll around in the deep blues and soft creams
Plush, downy assuagement
Should I stop, I risk your eyes on my naked…
So I keep rolling
And I smile, having found something to caress
For tonight.