Ascension

What could this be?
An elevator that takes me
eighty stories or more
in the air
with no semblance of walls,
guardrails or destination.
I feel floor 'neath my feet, but
I'm flying higher and higher.
Zooming below me is the world,
the city...
where am I?
It's an unfamiliar place,
but damn it feels like home.
In my waking mind, I only there realize
what it felt like.
Minnesota.
Is that home?
Maybe it is.
Maybe my dream is telling me
that I have to go...home.

Or maybe admittance
to confusion is a step up
from my confused confines.
Or am I finally coming to
realize something...unique?
That my love has outlasted the rest.
Has it?
Soon I'll find out.
Soon I'll know.
Soon it'll break my heart,
but I will know.
The ascension says so.
I shall know,
and in the end, it will enbolden me.

I remember my
nocturnal ascension.
It was dangerous,
and I was always near
the edge; I could have fallen.
Instead, I reached the top.
It was so high
I could see the city.
Was it glass that kept me in?
If so,
why didn't it splinter at my touch?
Was I too scared
to reach out?
Or did I reach out and find...
protection?
I do remember I was not alone,
that a looming, dark figure
was next to me.
He assured me that I would be okay,
and indeed he was right.
How did he know?
Is this dark figure a shadow of myself,
a darker semblance of the total me?
Or is it simply
a bolder version
or the more forceful person
I keep locked inside?
Is this telling me
what I've need to hear for so long?
To assert myself
trust my gut
and hold people to their actions?
Maybe it's a sign
that in real life
I shall ascend
in some way
and that in the end
I will be okay.