A Whale of a Tale

“Blast you, Whale! Must you breech every time you come up for air?”

“It’s what whales do, Jonah. Now hush!”

“I know this isn’t a Princess cruise, but couldn’t you have a little mercy on me? I get ink all over me every time I land on these rotten squid!”

“You brought this on yourself. You could have just gone to Nineveh like you were asked to, but, noooo; you had to flee like a coward.”

“Yeah, yeah, rub it in! I goofed and I get accommodations in a whale’s belly. What has it been? Five? Six days now?”

“It’s only been three days and two nights. I’ll be dropping you off soon.”

“Not soon enough! Moreover, you know, you scared the beejeebers out of me when I saw that leg floating around in here. Who was the unlucky chap to give up a leg to you?”

“Oh, some old fool sea captain by the name of Ahab. He wanted to make scrimshaw and oil out of me. What did I ever do to him, I ask you? All I ever do is swim the vast oceans, minding my own business, and this guy takes a pot shot at me with a harpoon! Did I really deserve that?”

“Oh, now he is going to blubber.”

“What?”

“I said, I don’t know, I’m a land-lubber.”

“Oh, I guess you wouldn’t know then.”

“Say Whale, before we reach our destination, do you think you could find some lobsters? I’m getting tired of eating these sardines and the krill, yeech! How can you stand to eat them? They‘re rather rubbery.“

“I suppose you would like me to find some butter to go with that?”

“Well, if you can swing it.”

“You know, Jonah, I could have just let you drown, but I had a higher calling and I don’t run away like some people do.”

“Geez! You aren’t going to let up on that, are you?”

“No, and we don’t have time for a lobster-fest anyhow. This is where you get out.”

“Oh, yeah, right. Ummm, how do I get out of here anyhow?”

“Urgh!”

“No!”

“Urggghhh!”

“Not that!”

“Blahhhhh!”

“GROSS!!!”

(word count:358)