God and Charles

(word count:507)

“Well, hello God!”

“Hey, Darwin! How’s evolution treating you?”

“Now, now God, sarcasm doesn’t become you, but, if you must know, it is treating me very well.”

“Ah, very good to hear, Charles! You do know that I have to be somewhat sarcastic. You are pretty much going through the motions of dispelling the fact that I and I alone, created the world and everything on it.”

“Oh, I have no doubt that you have had a hand in the beginnings of life. I just don’t think that--boom--there was man and that was that. What I do believe is that you allowed things to develop naturally.”

“Well, I did do a little dabbling with some rather rough creations…”

“Ah, yes! The prehistoric era!”

“Let me finish! I was very young then. My abilities were raw and child-like.”

“I believe you, God. What young lad doesn’t like monsters?”

“Ahem, yes, they did hold a certain fascination for me, one I grew out of. I did some more refined creations as I got older.”

“Ya know God, you really must do a better job of erasing your mistakes instead of using them as landfill. Did you never think that, one day, your latest creations might dig‘em up by accident? It had to be likening to a child coming across his own adoption papers.”

“To be honest with you, Charles, I couldn’t bring myself to totally destroy them. They were like a favorite toy, but one that is eventually forgotten about.”

“I understand. Somewhere in my attic, there is my beloved teddy bear, Reginald. He was my best friend when I was five. Still, finding bones and fossils was more than enough to pique the curiosity of mankind to make them want to question the validity of man‘s beginnings.”

“Okay, your point has been duly noted, Charles. I was careless in that respect.”

“Take heart, God. It’s not entirely your fault. You have a strong following in humankind. They may have been a bit carried away idolizing you in their simplistic minds. You made a point in, pardon the pun, putting the fear of God into them in your efforts to have them honor you.”

“Yeah, well…Ummm.”

“Good heavens! I have rendered you speechless! Forgive me, God. That was not my intention. I don‘t want to disprove you, only to show people that there was more to life than as we know it in the Bible.”

“You’re forgiven, Charles. You are right though, I am not all that different, in many ways, from the men I created. They are, after all, created in my image with subtle physical differences.”

“You are a very imposing figure, God. If it helps any, I still believe in you.”

“Coming from you, Charles, that does help.”

“Well, God, I need to be going, I don’t want to be late for church. Have a wonderful day.”

“You too, Charles, you too.”