Perpetual Ruminations

Stop Living to Stay Alive, How Does That Work?

I hope everyone who honors Christmas had a wonderful day, and for those who don't, I hope you had a wonderful day as well. W had a terrific Christmas eve and day, despite the pandemic. I would even venture to say that this Christmas may have been even a bit more special because of the pandemic. I mean, it put more focus on what Christmas is really all about.

For example, instead of getting together like we usually do, merry Christmas wishes were sent by text, cards, and email. This year, those messages seemed to hold deeper meaning for everyone. We spent Christmas eve and Christmas morning at home with the girls and had a wonderful time. This afternoon we went to my mother-in-law's to make her Christmas dinner and spend some time with her so she wouldn't be home alone today.

Usually, most of her family spends the greater part of the day at her house; this has become a regular tradition over the years. Since her family has grown quite large and her house isn't very large, plans were made this past summer to rent the local hall and have Christmas there. But then the second wave hit (when did the first wave end?), nobody wanted to get together and the plans were canceled. Even though a lot of her family lives close to her, they didn't want to risk getting together with her for Christmas day. They stop and visit her other days, they take her shopping and to appointments, and they have her over from time to time for dinner, but this year they canceled Christmas because of the pandemic.

A couple of them didn't even celebrate with their own families, they canceled Christmas completely. It's like, in my opinion, a small child who can't have his way and refuses to compromise or give in unless it's his way. In fact, we went over about one o'clock and stayed quite late. During the entire time, only one of her children called to wish her a Merry Christmas.

Now, don't get me wrong, I understand people being concerned about the increased cases of Covid and taking precautions. We are very careful about going to visit my mother-in-law and if there are any doubts about being exposed or if anyone even has a sniffle, we stay away. She's over eighty now and vulnerable, so we are careful. But, she doesn't care; she knows the risks, but she explains it quite well, she could die of old age or have a heart attack and die anytime. Why give up living when you have very little time left. She always tells us, I would rather visit with my family, catch covid, and die than to live another month alone and unable to visit them. Still, we are cautious but I do not have it in my heart to not go visit her or help her.

As for the others who are being so cautious they cancel Christmas; I understand, and if that's their choice, I will respect it. However, if that was truly the case, I shouldn't see them out and about with some of their family, extended, or with friends when we go shopping. If you cannot go to our mother's for lunch or have her over for lunch for fear of catching the virus, but you can go out once or twice a week to eat or get together every Sunday at church, I think there is something wrong.

I don't want to get into it with them, and it really isn't any of my business, but I see their bluff. They use the pandemic as an excuse when it fits their needs, but when it doesn't, they pay no heed. In fact, one person who didn't want to get together for Thanksgiving or Christmas because of the increased chance of spreading Covid, came over a few days ago to drop off some Christmas goodies. She always bakes a lot of stuff and normally would bring it over for the big get-together.

But this Christmas she canceled out on any get-together with anyone, too risky. But, she could drive to everyone's house on the same day, drop off her package, visit and then head to the next person and the whole time, not even wear a mask. So, how concerned was she about the pandemic?

I didn't mind, she's nice, makes awesome goodies, and we had a nice visit for over an hour. I'm just saying, her reasoning and her actions are in conflict, as are so many peoples. For some, it's just not thinking things through, for others, it fits their true desires. For me, I just live my life as much the same as I always have. If we meet, I will shake your hand and not feel a need for masks. But, if you are more cautious than I am, I will respect your desire to not shake hands, and if you desire, I will wear a mask for you.

I've stated it before, in different terms, but my opinion is, if I have to stop living to stay alive, what have I gained?