Toadette's Story

Chapter 17 - Dry Dry Detour

Taking the train from Toad Town to Mt. Rugged wouldn’t cost us a huge amount of time. If luck was on our side, we’d be there within the hour.

A recurring theme, huh? Luck. Well, now we were gambling on when Minh T. was gonna get to this line with Her Highness’s daughter. The line was only getting shorter by the second. What was she doing back there?

The princess snapped her fingers. “Ah, it’s about time!”

Not even a second to react, I yelped at the impact this Toad left on my cap. My thing was pink, it shouldn’t be hard to avoid!

“Congrats on nearly costing us this ride, friend.”

“Sorry. You know I don’t travel lightly.”

She didn’t travel lightly? But she had on the same clothes as before, with nothing changed. Behind her, however, Penelope waddled like she was a little Bumpty. Ooh, that poor bag was on the verge of bursting.

As if the stars aligned, the four of us were the last to board this train. With a solo cabin, at that. Once settled in, the thunderous engine ignited, and this train set its course for Mt. Rugged. Bumpy as the ride was, I couldn’t help but doze off. No vehicle did better at delivering a cosiness than a train.

Though I intended to catch some Z’s for a bit, feeling two heavy things on my lap interrupted those dreams. The princess’s socked feet scratched against my thigh.

“What’cha doin’? You can go back to sleep.”

“No, I’m good.”

The hell would she do with MY mouth if I were sleeping? Not wanting to find out, I pinched myself for an energy boost. Across the seats was like staring into a mirror. Penelope’s feet sat on Minh T.’s lap, only she sucked on those toes like jawbreakers. At this rate, the girl’s feet would never get the chance to dry.

Princess Daisy poked my shoulder with her big toe. “How’d an anti-feet girl like you end up with a foot-fanatic like that?”

“Never knew she was a foot freak until a few days ago.”

Minh T. pulled Penelope’s wiggling toes out her mouth, scoffing. Her lips opened, but the princess cut her off.

“Flower Girl, where’d you get your little fetish from?”

Rubbing Penelope’s feet against the side of her face, she looked to the corner. Did this question require much thinking from her?

“I guess grade four. Kinda noticed it when the other kids did sit-ups, and I had to hold their feet. After—”

“Lemme take it from here,” Princess Daisy said. “You felt weird about those barefoot girls, a few years passed, and you learnt what your condition was. Now, hold on, you’re a grown woman desperate to grab feet at every chance you got.”

Penelope’s feet dropped onto the seat. All Minh T. could say was, “You’re smart, Princess.”

“Was that ever a secret?”

We started to cross into the desert lands if the air was an indicator. Dry. The plains of grass surrounding Toad Town were but a blip in the background, replaced with cacti, tumbleweeds and an endless sea of sand. Finally, the princess pulled her heavy feet off my lap. Yet bafflingly, she stripped her socks off. Then her sweater.

“Did you forget the last time you took—”

She put a finger on my lips, doing that ‘ssh’ noise. “This isn’t some frigid sewer. It’s a desert. I barefoot this all the time back home.”

On this boiling hot sand? Yeah right. By the time we end the day, her feet will probably be red and burdened by blisters.

Penelope began to lift her shirt, and I yelled, “Keep your stuff on!”

“If Miss Daisy’s doing it—”

The princess rolled her shirt above her belly button. “Nah, listen to the girl, Penny. I’m the experienced one here.”

Off the train we stepped, with Mt. Rugged looming in the distance. What this mountain lacked in height it made up for in length and width. These thieves couldn’t have chosen a better location to make off to. Before we ascended the initial hill, I stopped the other three in their tracks.

“How about this? I take Penelope and search the west side of the mountain. You two can go on the opposite end.”

The princess put her hands on her hips. “Objection. I gotta stay with someone whose hands I can entrust my life in.”

“Also,” Minh T. grabbed Penelope’s shoulders. “The two of us have been gettin’ along real well, Toadette. We’ll be fine together.”

“Interesting,” I said.

WHOOSH!

With Penelope in hand, I bolted uphill and left a dust storm behind. Sorry, but Minh T. ALONE with Penelope sounded like the worst idea ever. Her horny tendencies sat at the bottom of the list of concerns. But I had to give them one message before we were too far.

“You know this area, Minh T.! If something happens, don’t hesitate to call me!”

Phew, far away from those two now. I could breathe a sigh of relief. Penelope looked like she’d been spinning in a tea-cup ride for hours.

“Alright, you’re in safe hands now, kid.”

“Your girlfriend is really nice.”

…To correct her or not to correct her? Eh, save that for later.

“Nice, but she can’t fight worth anything.”

At least leaving Minh T. with the princess meant someone in that pair-up could defend them a tad. And no, it wasn’t the Toad.

Now began our exploration of the western side of the mountain. Boy, this was a journey in itself. Did it always take 15 or 20 minutes to get to the westernmost point of Mt. Rugged? The sun may as well have been the Angry Sun with how it wanted to sap my energy.

“Miss Toadette, are you melting?”

Melting!? I tugged on my face, attempting to restore it to normal. Except… it was already normal.

Boy, this heat fried my mind. Penelope’s eyes scrunched, and she pillaged through her black bag. Now I’d fallen to one knee, flicking sweat beads off my face.

What was this? Water?

“You can have some of mine,” Penelope offered.

Aw… it wasn’t right for me to take her drink. But, given my slowed nature, what choice did I have? A sip at most is what I took. I’d have to function off that for the rest of the trip if we were skipping Dry Dry Outpost.

Penelope chugged her water down like an animal, and I sprang to seal her lips. “Save that for later, ’kay?”

For all I knew, the princess or Minh T. could be in the same situation I was in. Penelope’s concerns lay elsewhere. She pulled off a shoe, letting out a gentle sigh. Yeah, yeah, I got the hint. And if I let her go in only socks, imagine all the sand spurs that would cling to her. The image of that sent a shiver up my spine.

I hesitated but told her, “Go barefoot if you want.”

The other shoe hit me smack in the face. Now her pinkish toes curled like there was no tomorrow, and a smile appeared on her face. Ooh… Maybe I should…

No, going barefoot was out of the question in these sands. The sweat may have been building up in my stockings, but it could bubble there until we got home to the castle. Airing them out here wouldn’t hurt, though.

Once my left flat dropped to the sand, Penelope’s smile quickly switched to a gagging expression.

“What now?” I asked.

“Your feet!”

Oh please. Pinpointing the scent of feet amongst the smell of this mountainous atmosphere was impossible. Surely she was overreacting.

“My feet smell fine, kid. Watch.”

My rear hit the sand, and I brought my right leg up to my face. A flexible skill Minh T. sorely wished she had.

Sniff, sniff…

Blech! Okay, the girl had a point! My foot smelt like mouldy cheese, but I mean, it could be worse. Right? Amidst my urge to vomit, I forced a happy look on my face.

“Mmm! Smells delicious.”

Penelope glared at me like I was a clown. “Smelly feet are gross.”

“Tell that to the girl who sniffed your feet, ’cause she only seems to adore nasty stuff.”

Penelope got up and pushed her sneaker in my face. The nasty insole, not the bottom.

“Smell that and tell me it’s horrible.”

“How ’bout you do the same?” I took my flat and jammed it in the kid’s nose.

Her shoe smelt, well, like a sneaker. Definitely had a worn scent to it yet wasn’t quite as stinky as I expected. Odd. Now as for my flat, it must’ve had an overwhelming odour if my foot was anything to go by. Poor Penelope squealed like a baby to get away from my shoe, slapping my arms like that’d hurt me.

Alright, enough was enough. Simultaneously we fell back gasping for air, with Penelope’s face gaining a green hue. That got a heavy snicker out of me.

“Welcome to my job, kid.”

My foot entered its prison, with the stocking’s moisture becoming hot and steamy once again. If I’d known I’d be scaling a damn mountain, I’d have worn some flip-flops. Okay, that’s not the best footwear. But I had no boots, so…

Penelope fanned herself, regaining balance. “I mean, if I have stinky feet, it’s no big deal. But when someone else does, bleck!”

Hypocrisy is a wonderful thing to value, no? Alright, our mission was a failure. Time to see if Minh T. or Princess Daisy made some progress.

I sighed. “Found nothing but a few coins over here. You got something?”

“Is it suspicious if people wear black hooded coats out here?”

“No, Minh T. It’s 100% normal for the folk here to wear— Yes, it’s suspicious.”

A rustling happened before Princess Daisy’s voice came through. The quality of the call began dropping like mad.

“Three of these weird— Gotta start running here. We— Stalk them forever, Toadette. Get a move on!”

I hung up. Who could we be dealing with here this time? The actual thieves or some other group interfering?