Life as we know it sucks

Love endures all things...

Current mood: extremely happy

Current song: How Will I Laugh Tomorrow - Suicidal Tendencies


(The past few days)


12-29
DEXTER HOLLAND DAY!

Melissa told me that she sees Matt's name everywhere because she likes him so much and I told her I've never seen Jacob's name anywhere. She said,"Well, you will now just because you said that." And she was right! I read 2 poems with his name! It was terrifying. I was freaking out. All these signs, these things happening, these moments of realization. What is up with that? That's easy: Jacob's different. My relationship is different with him. He's my alter ego, I say. My soulmate. I'm 16 and I know this how? I feel it. This fire is burning inside me. It's insane! This is love. Not that puny little puppy love with Matt. This is LOVE. I don't get jealous when he talks about Kelly or other girls. I hardly get angry at him and when I do, I forget about it in an hour. I mean, think about it.

"Love is patient, Love is kind, Love does not envy"

I am being patient. He's still getting over Kelly, you know. And it's patience that keeps me holding on, trusting, hoping, and faithful. I am kind to him of course. I have pet names for him and he I. It's great. It's totally here! I can't say I've never loved someone now! And Jacob's happiness means everything to me. He told me tonight that I make him so happy. I am "normal" in his world. And I am the only person that deserves to be in his world. It's crazy. It's insane. It's not happening! I mean - pinch me, I MUST be dreaming. This only something that one watches on tv. Two people meet over the internet, connect, fall in love, and marry each other. (Ok, we're not married, but hey!) This isn't the type of thing that happens to ME. And he's 19. Surely he could love someone his own age. SURELY. Why me? That is the eternal question that continually pops up and he hates it when I question everything. He just doesn't understand how unreal this is. I should tell him this, right? Yes, probably. Perhaps I will...

1 Corinthians 13:4-10
"Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up; does not behave rudely; does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; does not rejoice in inequity, but rejoices in the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.
Love never fails. But whether ther are prophecies, they will fail; whether there are tongues, they will cease; whether there is knowledge, it will vanish away. For we know in part and we prophesy in part. But when that which is perfect has come, then that which is in part will be done away."

To include God's word into my love for Jacob says something. I've never even considered His word in my love life like that before. I love him so much. THere is nothing that could compare to him.