Life as we know it sucks

Hooked on a feeling

Current Mood: thoughtful

Current Music: Go with the flow - Queens of the Stone Age

I have never felt this relaxed around someone before. Well ok, around a guy. Shane told me last night that he won't hate me come time his birthday in August. He says he'll still like me a lot - maybe more. I think that's sweet and EXACTLY what Matt said. But, he's NOT Matt, so I shouldn't give up hope and judge him for Matt's loss.

I'm so happy with Shane and I could ruin it all with Jacob. I told him last night that I would rather be with him than Shane. That I like Shane and all, but there will be no one like him. Is that wrong?

Yes. I told Melissa that if there was even the tiniest of chances with Jacob, I would dump Shane on his ass. But, I know there's absolutely no chance - so why do I continue happy? Maybe there is. Perhaps I haven't quite convinced myself that there isn't. I'm probably tricking myself into thinking there is, especially when he told me he wanted to shower with me. That turned me on.

<sigh> Forget it, Hilary. You've got someone that treats you right, remember that. Don't ruin this now.

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but i threw you the obvious,
just to see if there's more behind you.
eyes of a fallen angel,
eyes of a tragedy
but i see,
see through it all.
see through, see you