The Newsletter Stand

Image Detail Revisited

Hiking. It's MY Action/Adventure!

Hey everyone! Robin here, your newest editor for Action/Adventure. In last week's newsletter, we talked about slowing down our scenes by using frame-by-frame detail to create adrenaline rushing action scenes. This week, we'll discuss detail in...well, detail. While it's not necessary for you to read last week's NL, you can access it through the following link:

http://www.writing.com/main/newsletters/action/archives/id/2355

Before you can string together those frame-by-frame shots into scenes, you must create the pictures themselves. Achieving image and sensory detail isn't as hard as it seems.

To begin, jot down your scene. Go overboard. The sky's the limit. Add more detail than you'll ever need. Don't forget to include visual and sensory--everything from sight, sound, smell, hearing, taste, touch, and kinetic detail. Where do you obtain this detail? Draw from everyday life. We receive countless image/sensory/kinetic details throughout every waking moment and sleep for that matter; why not use these as springboards in your writing? Flashes and snippets of sentences are perfect at this stage.

When finished, decide the purpose of your scene and it's relationship to the reader. Do you want it to invoke fear? tension? a sense of belonging? Or, are you character building?

Now it's time to mold and shape your scene. Skim over your list. Choose at least one odd or unusual description (these stick in the readers' minds), as well as ones you like. Chances are, if you find a particular piece of detail striking, so will your readers.

Here is a passage of a work-in-progress novel. Last week's readers may remember this. I'm using it again because...well...I'm the author of the passage and...it's handy. . Furthermore, I can offer insight into why and how I created the final product.

The 'it' in this passage is a flash drive, which contains important information the main character believes will clear her name.

...Scrunched beneath her hiding spot, Stephanie had a perfect view of Kerry's leg. She saw his hand fling an object in her direction.

The flash drive! She cupped her mouth to stifle a gasp and watched the drive skid across the floor. It ricocheted against the leg of the desk in front of her with a "clunk". Then, it changed directions. Now it headed toward her, spinning like a merry-go-round, before stopping its forward movement...inches out of her reach. Helpless, her eyes transfixed on the spinning drive, she heard a voice...

Let's talk about the flash drive. First, the author (me) uses the word 'clunk' for two reasons; one - to engage the reader --all readers can identify with a 'clunking' sound. When readers read this word, their kinetic sense let's them hear the clunk.

Two - at this point, the main character could get caught sneaking into her office building, rummaging around co-workers' desks. Adding the sound heightens the scene. The 'clunk' may be heard by the person whose voice is about to speak...in other words, her position may be discovered.

Now, let's talk about the spinning of the flash drive. I chose the words spinning like a merry-go-round. Lot's of things spin. For example, a dropped coin, a toy top, a dancing ballerina.

I ask myself, "What do these images do for my reader?"

Spinning like a top - Loud, fast, crazy, whimsical, colorful...

Spinning like a dropped coin - Instantly, the reader can HEAR and SEE the coin --making it a more powerful phrase. It's loud, unpredictable, and the image of money can create LOTS of symbolism.

Spinning like a merry-go-round - methodical, relaxing, lulling, not fast.

I liked the merry-go-round image because I follow it up with a sentence telling the reader how Stephanie's eyes are transfixed on the object. A methodical spinning one is easier to transfix the eye to, than an object that spins erratically. Also, the merry-go-round is a warm childhood memory. I will weave this contrast throughout my scenes.

What does all this mean for you as a writer? Well, when all is said and done, you have an abundant supply of detail at your fingertips. Grab bits and pieces of your day to help create the picture or scene you're after. Remember, unlimited possibilities exist with presentation and arrangement. Pick up your pencil and get busy. Craft your scenes with engaging detail!

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