Holiday Stories and Poems

Alien Encounter Number 645719

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An alien's first contact with Earthlings is on Halloween.



Writer's cramp:(24 hours/ 1,000 words or less) Be an alien from another world and describe the inhabitants of Earth on Halloween in a message back to your mother ship.

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Alien Encounter Number 645719

         This is RJKLEMBERTES 2345.6 reporting back from my explorations of Planet Earth. I have made first contact with the citizens of this planet and find them to be friendly, generous, and uninhibited. I most hardily recommend that we go forward on our plans to create an Earth/Nudgekuggle alliance. As creative and playful as the Earthlings seem to be, their communal good spirits should bring great enlightenment to our overly grave and suppressed civilization.

         The following is a precise account of my experiences with the Earthlings. It is hoped that by reading it, the council will have a better understanding of my reasoning:

         My ship landed at twilight. I had only just unbolted my door for exit, when a party of Earthlings came walking up the ramp. I shot out my head to take a quick look. One member of the party screamed. I withdrew immediately because I had repeatedly been warned of the Earthlings' xenophobia, I thought the poor creatures would depart in fear, but they did not. They only laughed and said, “Cool.”

         Then one member of the group knocked the back of his hand on my portal. I traveled to the door and spoke in their language, saying, “Hello.” The eyes of the four creatures who stood there staring into my craft bulged rather strangely, but they did not flee upon seeing the rest of my body. One of them said, “Cool costume.”

         I waited for them to return my greeting, and they did shortly, saying, “Trick or treat.” (Note: Please check the language units. This friendly greeting was not listed.)

         The humans were dressed quite differently than our artists had sketched them. One Earthling was clothed from head to foot with white material and wore chains around his waist and legs. A second had a tall, black hat and a very warty-looking nose that extended remarkably farther than in those photos of the Earth inhabitants we’d studied. The other creatures wore varied clothing in many patterns and styles, and all of them had painted their faces with colorful lines and squiggles. One of them had a fabric patch over his eye.

         I noticed that each Earthling held a small, orange bucket in his hands and seemed to want me to take something from it. I reached in and removed a colored package. The creature whose bucket I had taken the squishy-feeling bag from did not appear to be pleased. He shook his head energetically, and said, “Hey, dude, you’re supposed to be giving us candy, not taking it.”

         I was unsure about the nature of candy, but I figured that if a gift was desired, I should donate one. Not knowing if one of our Nudgekuggle nutrition bars would be suitable to the diet of an Earthling, I dropped a fuzzball in each of their buckets. The Earthlings broke out in smiles.

         It was most gratifying to see the creatures' eagerness to perform such an interspecies exchange. I smiled also.

         But then they turned to go, having returned nothing from their culture. I called out, “Wait. Don’t you have something for me?”

         “You hungry, man?” one of them said.

         I nodded eagerly, quite willing to sample their planet’s source of nutrition, but with my head gesture, a hand suddenly reached out and took a grip on my arm. I found myself moving forward, part of their group. I ambled amiably and attempted to keep up with their conversation, but the one dressed in green with fake blood dripping from the plastic nails applied to his forehead spoke with phrases that I had never down-loaded. (“Yeah, the next house’ll fix you up good. They give awesome stuff.”)

         Together, we climbed a small hill, and at the top a house, draped with orange lights and glowing, orange vegetables, which sat on steps leading upward to the door, was sending out eerie noises -- animal screeches and screams. For a moment I had a flush of apprehension and attempted to stop to reflect on the situation, but my new alien friends swept me forward.

         “Hey, man, hang cool,” one of them told me.

         I nodded and accompanied them to the door. The light above the porch suddenly glowed brighter, the door opened, and a man dressed like those of our research sketches shoved a large bowl full of colored packages in our faces. I greeted him as the others did with “Trick or Treat.” He replied by growling and grunting and waited for us to dive our fingers into the gifts. I took several of the packages and stashed them into my pockets.

         We continued such interesting behavior for several hours. When my inner pockets were bulging with gift specimens and the hour had grown to the apex of darkness, I was forced to return to my ship. Sadly I said goodbye to my new friends, who wished me “Hang loose", “Be cool, Man", “Take care", and “May the force be with you.” I replied in kind and watched them depart from my doorway.

         It is difficult to express the great joy that my sharing with another species has brought me. Their warmth and generosity have overwhelmed any xenophobia I might otherwise have inadvertently exhibited. I must once again extol the virtues of this species. They are charming individuals. For that reason and because their gifts were exceedingly delicious, I would not object to further explorations and friendships.

Respectfully,
First Commander, RJKLEMBERTES 2345.6

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