*Magnify*
SPONSORED LINKS
Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/books/entry_id/894355
Rated: 13+ · Book · Comedy · #2087000
What good is freewill ?
#894355 added October 13, 2016 at 11:36pm
Restrictions: None
I don't want excuses !
"A well ordered company can never tolerate excuses.
If there is a problem, fix it.
Don't blame other people for your poor management.
Just do it right!
Do you like working here?
There are rules and incentives for success full people!"

Joseph Bananas listened intently to his power speaking tape.
He was a chronic underachiever ..
He braked suddenly for a fare.
Driving an Uber taxi was his first step to success.
Very soon he would have his own house and family.
"Don't count your chickens before they hatch." the CD continued.

"Hi. I'm Satan." the young lady said as she sat beside Joseph.
"Em. The costumer sits behind on the back seat." Joseph smiled and pointed.
"Oh? I never take a back seat. Would you like to be rich?" the lady kissed Joseph.
Joseph coughed, "I'm just following company orders."
"No one tells me what to do." Satan said and the minivan flew into the air.
"Help!" Joseph Bananas yelped as his minivan did a nose dive.

"Did you ask me for help?" Satan queried calmly.
"Yes!" Joseph screamed and beeped his horn at the traffic bellow.
The minivan landed gently in a parking space..
Joseph lept out an fell to his knees, "Oh, my Gahd!"
"Did you ask for my Help?" Satan asked as she stood over Mr. Bananas.
Joseph kissed her stilleto heels.
"You humans are so weak. Why would God help you?" the curvaceous satanic lady giggled.
"I don't know.. I just want to be a winner!" Joseph bananas stood on his shaking legs.

Satan took a long drag on her Tipperilo cigar and blew the smoke in his face.
She grew to 100 feet and pressed him under left stilleto ..
"I am a motivated team player!" he squealed.
"This is my city! My world!" the giant lady bellowed.
"Okay-okay!" Joseph Bananas wiggled out from under the tip of her stilleto.
She shrank down to his level, "Oh, what were going to do to you." she smirked.
"How will you help me?" he whimpered.
"I will teach you to care only about yourself." Satan grabbed Joseph's crotch.
Joseph felt a lust for money and power.

"You will rule the world with kuru." the lady gave a Cheshire cat smile.
"What?" Joseph bowed his head, "Is that marshal arts?"
She roared a satanic laughter, "It is the art of devouring your enemies."
Joseph smiled, "Yes-yes! Work smart not just hard!"
Satan rolled her Betty Davis eyes, "Just kill anyone who gets in your way."
She took a bite of an apple and handed it to him.
He ate it, "I am invincible!"
Joseph Bananas ran out into traffic and was instantly killed by a Mac Twinki Truck ..

The satanic lady laughed and tossed the apple core onto Joseph's crumpled body.
"I do not share power!" she roared and signed an autograph,
"Kimberly Guilfoyle."

Reflections~ If the Bible is God's word, why are there so many different interpretations?


And Jesus met a tiger in the desert.. (666)


^^
V
© Copyright 2016 bob county (UN: muzzy43 at Writing.Com). All rights reserved.
bob county has granted Writing.Com, its affiliates and its syndicates non-exclusive rights to display this work.
Log in to Leave Feedback
Username:
Password: <Show>
Not a Member?
Signup right now, for free!
All accounts include:
*Bullet* FREE Email @Writing.Com!
*Bullet* FREE Portfolio Services!
Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/books/entry_id/894355