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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/books/entry_id/938284
Rated: 13+ · Book · Comedy · #2162989
This is a dumpster for some really bad but funny (cringy) stories.
#938284 added August 7, 2018 at 9:56pm
Restrictions: None
Idiotic Compilation: Story VIII: How to Play... US Football
1. You get a football
1a. The American one
2. You put the ball in your arms and you run down a field with your teammates who never got a chance to catch a ball
3. If the defense picks you up and puts you on a plane to Miami, then you need to go back to where the defense put you to Miami and start over
3a. You only go to Miami 4 times. That's called a down. When you don't make it past 10 yards within a down, then you get to throw the other team to Miami.
4. If you make it past the downs and go to the end, then you get a touchdown and you get 666 points
4a. You can throw the ball (not the players) to Miami the place over the yellow fork thing
5. Now you can be the defense and throw the other team to Miami
6. The team who wins moves on until the Super Bowl.


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The Super Bowl:

It's an event where rich kids put ads about Doritos in hopes of getting famous
It's an event where fat Americans eat stuff that makes them fatter
It's an event that determines whether your team is total crap or not
It's also an event where the water costs a goddamn 8 dollars.

And it's also an event where people buy tickets 5 years in advance so you'll never get that VIP seat (hecc off u rich kids)

Thanks for reading about sports
Now you can be better than that Cam Newton kid who dabbed after he did a touchdown at like, 2016 or something
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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/books/entry_id/938284