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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/books/entry_id/954178-Tequila-Women
Rated: 18+ · Book · Personal · #1196512
Not for the faint of art.
#954178 added March 12, 2019 at 1:03am
Restrictions: None
Tequila! Women!
No, it's not what you're thinking. Jeeze, you people and your gutter minds.

https://www.cnn.com/travel/article/tequila-international-womens-day-mexico/index...

If not for women, there'd be no tequila

...It's here that casual sippers drink this aromatic spirit, but there's one secret they may not know: Without the women of Tequila, there'd be no tequila.


First of all, if not for women, there'd be no <insert name of anything humans create> because there'd be no humans to create it.

Okay, fine, the article is more nuanced than that.

Tequila, of course, is one of the cornerstones of civilization, along with whiskey, wine, and beer. You know what my greatest concern about climate change is? It's not the loss of coastal cities. It's not a greater incidence of extreme weather systems. It's not mass extinctions, decimation of the human population (actually, 1/10 is a conservative estimate), water insecurity, wars, desertification of food-growing regions, or even the loss of coffee. Y'all brought that shit on yourselves. No, it's that the particular climate required to grow blue agave will shift away from the Tequila region, thus cutting off my supply of tequila.

I can only trust that when this happens, Mexico will relax the laws to allow tequila to be made elsewhere.

You know what else has a long history connected specifically with women? Beer. You'd never know it today, as something like 95% of all microbrewers are bearded hipster dudes, and the macrobrewers are run by faceless, genderless corporations. But historically, it was women who brewed the beer, passing down secrets along with (presumably) beauty tips and advice on how to bag rich men.

To be fair, beer would work for both of those.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Women_in_brewing

From the 18th century onwards, women were increasingly barred from the business of brewing, except as barmaids or "publicans", licensees running pubs.

In ancient Sumeria, brewing was the only profession that was "watched over by a female deity", namely Ninkasi.

Yeah, I know this is a bit late for International Women's Day, but hell, why not make every day International Women's Day? Especially if there's beer and/or tequila involved.

Just don't expect me to do a Deadpool cosplay.

© Copyright 2019 Robert Waltz (UN: cathartes02 at Writing.Com). All rights reserved.
Robert Waltz has granted Writing.Com, its affiliates and its syndicates non-exclusive rights to display this work.
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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/books/entry_id/954178-Tequila-Women