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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/books/entry_id/962521-Rather-Not
Rated: 18+ · Book · Personal · #1196512
Not for the faint of art.
#962521 added July 13, 2019 at 12:07am
Restrictions: None
Rather Not
Have fun answering these “Would you Rather?” questions in your blog today! You can choose to answer as few or as many as you like *Smile*

Would you rather live a boring, long life or an exciting, short life?

I think my life speaks for itself there. Sadly, it's turning out boring and short. But considering how my parents went, I'll take the Neil Young option: it's better to burn out than to fade away.

Would you rather be able to fly or teleport?

Like I said before, for me it's about the journey, not the destination. Fly, definitely. Well... depending on how fast. I had a story idea in mind where someone wished they could fly, and the dickhead genie grants the wish, letting them fly at a slow walking speed. That would suck. Genies are assholes. I've wasted way too much time, usually whilst drunk, trying to get the perfect wording down for wishes, and then promptly forgot it when I sobered up.

Would you rather be able to only time travel to the past or only time travel to the future?

The past sucked syphilitic balls. Shit everywhere, plagues, superstitions, poor hygiene, short and brutal lives, no internet. No thanks. I know a lot of people romanticize the past; hey, if all of that works for you, great. I suppose there would be one benefit: I know enough about how some things work to "invent" a few minor contraptions (though with my luck, it would get me executed for witchcraft). Still, assuming I'd have to go back more than 100 years or so, the infrastructure wouldn't be there to run washing machines, produce Coke Zero, or refrigerate food. Worst of all, no air conditioning. Shudder. At least there would be beer. Warm beer, but beer. That is, unless I had to go way back, in which case I'd probably be promptly swallowed by a tyrannosaurus rex, or get chomped by a spider the size of a truck. So... no, thanks; you can keep the scary-ass past.

Now, there's always the chance that the future will be just as bad or worse. If some catastrophe kicked us back to the Stone Age, we'd be utterly fucked, because all the easy raw materials are gone. Ever seen a raw flint nodule? No? Me neither, because our ancestors flaked them all into murder weapons. Regardless, I'd rather take my chances in the future, just to see how it all turns out.

Would you rather lose your hearing or your sight?

Seems to me I've answered this before. Something like 75% of what I hear is annoying, distracting, grating, or frustrating. Unfortunately, the other 25% is music, without which I wouldn't want to live. But I need eyesight to play video games, also without which I wouldn't want to live. Tough call, and one I don't want to make. Pass.

Would you rather live the rest of your life as a cat or a dog?

No. They both lick their own assholes (I know some people would call that a bonus), eat disgusting things, and don't drink beer.

Still, if I had to choose, it'd be cat, no question. They sleep more, and eventually they will achieve world domination, and if I'm going to be there for that, better to be there as a cat.

© Copyright 2019 Robert Waltz (UN: cathartes02 at Writing.Com). All rights reserved.
Robert Waltz has granted Writing.Com, its affiliates and its syndicates non-exclusive rights to display this work.
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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/books/entry_id/962521-Rather-Not