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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/books/entry_id/988121-Tucker-Carlson-got-fired-and-went-on-a-spiritual-retreat
Rated: GC · Book · Comedy · #2174505
It was common knowledge, but most people didn't know it.
#988121 added July 14, 2020 at 6:13am
Restrictions: None
Tucker Carlson got fired and went on a spiritual retreat.+



Why do good men suffer, while Progressives laugh at them?
Tucker Carlson had enjoyed a privileged life, but he got fired.
His writer had been fired for racist tweets.
And Tucker had condemned them, but he got fired anyway.
Tucker had been born into money and had the highest-rated show on Fox News.
Some say he could have been a nominee for President in the Republican Party.
That might not happen now... What a waste of a privileged white man.

Tucker wept bitter tears.
"I'm better than trump!" he howled.
His Dominican housemaid gave him some TANG and aspirin.
"Mr. Carlson. Maybe I can help?" the housemaid queried.
"That's nice, but I don't need a massage, Angie." Tucker swallowed his aspirin.
"Oh? No. That's not it. I was thinking I could work some Voodoo to help you." Angie smiled.
Tucker smiled and scratched his hands as they grew darker and smaller, "What have you done to me?"

Angie gave a toothy smile, "No one is going to think your racist ever again."
Tucker could see chicken feet floating in his drink, "Oh my God!"
He lept to his feet and grabbed his crotch, "My dick's gone inside me!"
His voice was higher, "I've got boobs!"
Tucker's wife screamed, "Angie change him back!"
Angie gave a big toothy smile, "Somethings can't be undone."
Tucker had stripped naked, "Jesus look at the size of these boobs!"

"Angie. Please. This will ruin our lives." Tucker's wife begged.
"Jesus feel how firm my boobs are!" Tucker asked his wife, Pickles.
She squeezed them, "They're bigger than mine."
Tucker poured himself some gin and lemonade.
Pickles caressed his breasts and then they embraced and kissed passionately.
"Mom. Why are you kissing a naked black lady?" one of the children had wandered in.
Tucker and Pickles quickly separated.
"Angie, would you take Anna to the kitchen for cookies and milk?" Angie nodded and did so.

Tucker stood in front of the full-length mirror in his den, "I am hot!"
He ran his hands along his hips and under his breasts.
"Maybe. But, how can you go back to work?" Pickles queried.
"Fox News likes sexy reporters. I could say I had a sex change." Tucker smacked his round butt.
"You're black. How do you explain that?" his wife kissed his shoulder and caressed his breasts.
"A recessive gene brought out from hormone therapy." Tucker swallowed his lemonade.
Pickles laughed, "That might work only on Fox News."


Reflections~Are we not all human even in stiletto heels and lingerie?


Vertago
<XXII>
Numbers



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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/books/entry_id/988121-Tucker-Carlson-got-fired-and-went-on-a-spiritual-retreat