%%USERNAME%%    %%ACCWORDS%% %%ONOFF%% |
  My blog was filled up. I'm too lazy to clean it out. So I started a new one. |
| I have frequently written about my back deck and plants. Today it is getting a makeover. Everything was packed up and hauled out into the yard. I am positive the deer will graze on the flowers and herbs now at their level. I may have to start over with them. The deck will be power washed tomorrow, I guess. The back windows are not finished yet, so I don't know which painter will dominate in the morning and decide. It takes 24 hours for the sealant to dry, so I'm guessing things will be in the yard at least two days, maybe three. The chives and sage will come back next year, but the basil, pansies, and other things will not. However, in my mind, I'm anticipating a clean new coated deck and railing and wheelchair ramp (no longer actively used by a wheelchair). The furniture and grill will be returned, minus a swing I want trashed. The pots of summer plants will be emptied and carried behind the shed when I am well enough to handle them. I'm picturing myself on a sunny day in a sweater, sitting on my clean deck with reduced plants enjoying what remains and the sounds of nature all around me. Next spring I will plant marigold seeds that I harvested from this year's plants. I'll buy some new planters to replace the old cracked ones. I'll buy new basil seed, because I love to smell it. Once again I will have my oasis We'll rehang the rain gauge and the hummingbird feeder and the thistle seed feeder. (How will my cardinals and doves make it a few days?) Soon the blue jays and wrens will return. Unfortunately, the squirrels/tree rats will return, too. But at least, after its absence, I will have my little haven back again. |
| I have to acknowledge the good intentions of a number of people, some of whom I have grown close, some of whom I'm still getting acquainted. I have been brought soup and cake by one person, soup and rip plums by another One brought a breakfast casserole, assembled and ready to be baked the next day. We ate it for 3 days, and a visiting family member polished it off this afternoon. We've had fruit salad (easily digestible fruits) and delicious chicken salad with raisins. One lady brought a quiche. My Bible study class sent a beautiful multi-colored mum. That means my bruised, sore body has had to amble to the door more times than I wished. I'm too slow these days for the door bell. Because of my blood thinner, my bruises go from above my waist almost down to my knees, and they hurt. Until my hemoglobin is back up, my doctor is concerned about me being light-headed and moving too quickly. But I should definitely keep moving. If only the guests could arrive when I'm walking or at least not in the bathroom. The food is nice. Not dirtying up a bunch of pans or cooking is nice, too. But it's the thoughtfulness that is overwhelming. People who are already busy have gone out of their way to cook something for me, to drive out of their area, and deliver what they thought would be helpful to me. You can never predict how much you can move someone with a container of soup, or a handmade dish. The kindness feeds the soul more than the food the body. I am truly blessed to know such wonderful people, and am encouraged by their tenderness. |
| Of course, I would be an exceptional case, not in a good way. My "rock star" oncologist has performed the same surgery on multiple people with my existing, on-going health issues, without too much trouble. I became the challenge. One day after being released from the hospital, I felt weak and listless as well as uncomfortable, and in pain. Twenty-fours hours more passed, and I didn't think I could go on. The next morning, convinced I was dying, I felt my breathing was labored and could hardly climb the stairs. When I felt a little nauseous standing in my kitchen, I took a deep breath. Next a loud thwacking sound woke me to find myself lying on the cold kitchen floor. I was aware that I had hit my head pretty hard, but didn't register headache. I had plenty of room to stretch out there and felt no inclination to get up. I could hear, the mid-day stock report on the TV downstairs and knew my elderly father was in the house. I thought about lying there until he came up, but knew he would panic and not know what to do. Slowly, I rolled over and got to my feet. I went to a chair with my cell phone. If I said I needed the hospital, my father would insist on driving me--old school. He would kill us both and maybe somebody else before we got there. I called my patient advocate who wasn't concerned about me fainting, but did express concern for hitting my head while on blood thinner. She recommended going to ER. I called my niece to come over, but she didn't answer, so I called 9-1-1. The niece called back, I explained what I needed but that the ambulance could actually get me checked in faster. They'd have me on file before I got there. She arrived about the same time they did. She stayed with my dad a while. You really become aware of ll the dips, cracks and pits in the road there are when your mid-section has recently undergone surgery. ER is a nightmare. Men and women together in the same area. At least a slot with a curtain was reserved for me. People were in beds in the halls. I spent over 24 hours in ER waiting for a room. ER is noisy, has no privacy and a shared bathroom. The employees barely had room to maneuver around the beds and equipment. Turns out I had internal hemorrhaging. My hemoglobin was way down. I needed 4 transfusions over the next 5 days, and went home with the hemoglobin still down, but improved. This set back my healing. I'm not where I should be in getting back on my feet I haven't had a good night sleep in over 2 weeks, and my gastric distress, which is normal after surgery, is still off the charts. Because of the internal bleeding and the transfusions, I'm way behind in normalizing my gut. I had a blood test Thursday showing the hemoglobin has only risen a bit more, so that accounts for my fatigue, Hopefully, it will rise a bit closer to normal by Monday when I do another test. At least I'm far enough past the anesthesia that I can start driving myself. I still have to be reserved in my actions for four more weeks just to allow both internal and external scars to heal. That's no trouble right now, since everything still hurts. That's life. That's my life anyway. No use to be bitter or down. I don't feel like reading or writing or crocheting in my stillness. Most days I don't even look at e-mail. But I take advantage of the windows like I'm having right now to do something before it closes. I'm grateful to be alive. They believe they have all the cancer. I face radiation in a few months, but that's tomorrow's worries. |
 Log in to Leave Feedback |
View Portfolio
Visit Notebook
Send Gift Points
Awards
Badges
Send Email
Community Newsfeed
General Discussion
Sponsored Items
Book of Trinkets
Static Items
Books
Groups
Interactive Stories
Audio
Campfire Creatives
Community Notes
Crossword Puzzles
Documents
Folders
Images
In & Outs
Madlibs
Photo Albums
Polls
Product Reviews
Quizzes
Survey Forms
Web Pages
Word Searches
