The Lounge

my responses are geared toward what I am currently writing.

she dreamed of being crushed within his embrace. It just rubs me the right way. In terms of Constance and Ethan/Silverbolt its a great line that works with the supernatural aspect of the story.

His body ached for her touch. I changed this one around. I like it because most heroes are tortured souls and feel they can't be with someone. It creates a sense of yearning


She found herself extremely conscious of his virile appeal. This statement feels outdated. When was the last time someone said virile?

She replied with complacent buoyancy. Is this romance? Isn't buoyancy a nautical term? Isn't complacency the enemy? Her words floated on wings of heartfelt emotion sounds better.

The smoldering flame she saw in his eyes startled her. I am all about the eye contact before the kiss or touch, the eyes always kick things off.