Katie,
         I saw your suitcase on the Anniversary Review page and thought I'd drop in for a visit. Happy 1^st WDC Anniversary!

         This is a nice poem of you dreaming of your love. It's a little short, but it has a good beginning, middle and end in this space. You sound young in this, as if you're in high school still, and that's fine. Young love is always something that astonishes me; but I remember my younger days too. If I may, I have a little feedback for you.

1. Loveing and you think your loved back, it feels so real, but realizing its just a drem This line has three errors in it. It's your description of the poem, meant to lure readers in! I would think that anyone seeing a description with this many errors wouldn't want to view/review this, so they've stayed away. If I may suggest an edited version of it. Loving you, seeing our love in your eyes, I know you love me; then I wake up from my dream

2. This would look really nice centered on the page.

3. Some of your lines are a bit longer than others, leading to a break in the rhythm. A rhyming poem is all about rhythm, making it flow smoother. You don't need the syllable count to be the same in each line (at least in my opinion), but it has to be close. Your syllable count is 8/8/8/9/11/9/11/10/9/8/8/9/11/13. I think you can see where you might have a chance to improve this.

4. Funny when Im with you, how the time flies Im needs an apostrophe (I'm)

5. You're mine to have, thats whats at stake This reads a bit rough. It's because of your use of <thats whats> in the line. Both should have an apostrophe since they are contractions. But then if you separate each of the words, you get You're mine to have, that is what is at stake See what I mean? You might try rewording this a little.


Overall, a nice poem about young love. And I do love, love poems.


Sum1