Naveedsk, thank you for the privilege of sharing this review of your good poem. I am counting on my words encouraging you in life and in your writing. :D

Overall Impression: The title intrigued me because the term, "a Dervish" has become associated in popular culture with a person of such frenetic tendencies as to appear to be a small person-sized tornado, (aka a "whirling dervish.") I did not realize, until now, that a dervish is a Muslim order. Thank you for educating me in this, Sir. There appears to be a struggle going on inside of the dervish between his vow of poverty/austerity and the love of a dear young girl. There is a conundrum here in his mind. The more he struggles against this conundrum the more she expresses her undying love.

Suggestions: You may already know of my love of rhythm, which would make this an easier read for me. However, the subject of the poem is angst, which lends itself to a choppy cadence or free verse. It's your call, my Friend. The free verse works for this poem.

Rhythm & Rhyme Scheme: Rhythm & rhyme are understandably absent in this free verse poem, but the refrain, "O beloved!" stands proudly in each verse to express the intent of the heart.

What I Like: The last verse expresses a love that is not ended by death. The dervish stands on the final precipice of life being torn between love of his LORD and love of his dear lady. He vows that even when he is with his LORD, he will still love his lady! Great pathos! Nicely written! Good job, Sir! WRITE ON!

Thank you for taking the time to read my review. I hope I have been beneficial to you in some way. :D