Bikerider has reviewed "Grammy's Special Lil Man "  written by Patrece ~

Hi Patrece ~

I'm reviewing your story for "Gang's Monthly Review Board"  I hope you find my comments on your work helpful.

Review of:

Grammy's Special Lil Man   (E) A very special 3 year old. A writing of love, hope & challenge. #1963227 by Patrece ~

I am fulfilling the package your bid won in the Simply Positive auction. I'm glad your bid won because it's introduced me to your port, and I'm finding so much to read there.

First Impressions:

What a heartfelt story you've shared with us! I have three grandchildren, and I thank God for their health.




You did a good job of introducing the reader to your grandson in small ways that eventually added up to me feeling as if I know him. He sounds like quite a guy. You showed the way he deals with his problems, and the way you deal with them. It's very touching the way you never once complained about the stresses a child like Braxton can cause. There is no doubt about the love that surrounds this special young man.

You wrote: But I have to admit, my favorite thing to hear him say is "wuv you." It is a hit-and-miss process getting him to articulate, but when he tells me he "wuvs" me, my heart just melts, especially when he offers those sweet little words on his own without mimicking me. These are his favorite words, and it is my favorite sentence in this story.

Grammar/Punctuation/Spelling:

I saw no problems here. The story is perfect as written.



As I read this story, it occurred to me that what you have written here is a tribute to your grandson, Braxton. And you should be proud of what you have done.

I'd like to suggest that maybe you could write an episode each time something changes for Braxton. The breakthroughs, the pitfalls, the successes as well as the failures. I think it would make for an interesting chronicle for your readers, and probably for Braxton as he grows up.

You've done a remarkable job of guiding a reader through the myriad problems Braxton, and his family, faces without judging, without allowing your personal emotions to fog the issue.

The main take away for me after reading this story is that, in spite of his personal problems, Braxton is surrounded by love, and that makes him a lucky young man.

Well done, Patrece. Thank you for sharing this personal story.

Bikerider







My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .