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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4511286
Review #4511286
Viewing a review of:
 The Football match  [E]
A Football enthusiastic rushing home to watch finals of world cup Football
by Rufus
Review by Angus
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)
*BalloonR* Welcome to WDC from "Newbie Welcome Wagon! *BalloonR*

Hello there, Rufus!
This isn't bad for one of your first pieces on here. And as a fellow football fan myself, albeit the American version, I can totally relate to this!
I like how had this conversation with your wife as you tried to explain how important it was to you, as well why it was important to you. Heck, you even explained how they were connected by using that analogy of the 22 feet arranging themselves to 'score the perfect goal of the life'.
Makes perfect sense to me!
Nice ending, too.
Great spelling and telling, but I did spot a few tiny niggles (sorry to be so picky, but grammar is kind of a pet peeve of mine):
"The Football match at 8.30(,)" I told her & ran in to the washroom.
"That's the very point, darling(,)" I told my wife.
"...poem or a flash fiction"(.) I told her stepping...' (should be a comma)
"...to score the perfect goal in their life(".) (.")
Otherwise, nice job!
Kee ponw ritin gon, Rufus, and welcome to WdC! If you like to write, then you're going to love it here!
PS-You might want to get your bioblock (biography) set up so we can know a little something about you (hobbies, favorite books/authors, location, etc.), but that's up to you, of course.
PPS-And since you’re new here, perhaps you’d like to check out "Noticing Newbies and introduce yourself to the rest of the community if you haven’t already.


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