Hello Dave !

I'm here with "Angel Review Forum"  for this review. You also entered into my contest for the May edition of "Inner Strength Contest " . Let's get rolling!

Corrections/Suggestions

First impressions- This is a sweet perspective of overcoming with the outlook of it being siblings. I can relate to this since my own sibling we have a history and times we've had to face dark shadows or overcome together. I have a lot of love for this poem with the way that you take on this challenge of overcoming and spin it into the story of your brother and you. How you may go down different paths, bicker over who gets to eat that last of the chocolate icing bowl, but your siblings at the end of it.

I really don't have anything to edit, add, or change for your poem. There are some strong and great lines within this poetic piece. I think that the way you ended it is quite strong too. That whatever faces you when you stand together at the sunset, the you fill face them together.

Things Which I Enjoyed
until the zephyr of life
blew our dreams away.

There's other lines besides these which were favorites of mine. The imagery is strong in this piece and you use your metaphors well to strengthen your message. I can also attest to the message of this poem that when you go your separate ways its hard to come back together as siblings. Life does seem to move quite quickly and you need to make that time for each other when you're not in the same household.

Overall Comments
Overall, this a great entry to my contest and I appreciate you taking the time to enter in it. I enjoyed this piece about how you overcome with having a sibling in mind with it. The last two lines of this poem ends it strongly and without a feel of it being incomplete. I hope to see you again with my Inner Strength contest. Thank you for sharing and keep on writing! =D



My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .