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 Review #4570101 |
 | Mrs. Sutphin's Malady  [13+] A doctor discovers a spider has taken up residence in one of his patient's ears.  |
| (5.0)  Greetings, Josh Bolling! I discovered this piece the Newbies Work List page. I also noticed you are brand new to WDC, beginning five days ago! Welcome! I hope you are enjoying the site! If you have any questions, please feel free to ask.  First of all, my reviews are intended to be helpful and encouraging, not hurtful in any way. Use what you feel works for you, and leave the rest.What I Liked  I liked that you kept my interest in this Twilight Zone-type tale! What great images you produced in my mind, such as a tiny spider nestled in the hairs within Mrs. Sutphin's ear. The main character--the doctor who likes his gin and tonics--thinks of his weekly rounds in the Atlantic Coast Care Facility as inspecting the walking dead! Another great visual that shows the too-excited doctor's anxiety over spotting the tiny brown spider once again... My breaths are short and a bead of sweat trails down my back underneath my button-up. I switch the otoscope's light on and peer into the void of her ear. Excellent image! And then there's the ending!  Oh. My. Goodness.  I believe the doctor went off his rocker! The perfect ending, of course.  Suggestions to Consider My only suggestion is irrelevant to the rating and review of this piece. Most members double-space between paragraphs because it makes it a little easier to read on a computer screen, especially for the sake of reviewing. I did appreciate the larger print and the indented paragraphs!  Final Thoughts A great and entertaining piece of writing! It might, however, make me think twice next time my doctor takes a peek into my own ear. Though mine isn't hairy... at least I don't think it is. Have a great day and... K e e p on W r i t i n g ! Cubby ")
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You responded to this review 09/12/2020 @ 7:34am EDT