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Review #4579870
Viewing a review of:
Great and Sudden Change  [18+]
"Nothing is so painful to the human mind as a great and sudden change."
by 💙 Carly
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)
Dear 💙 Carly ,

Congratulations on the Bard's Hall first place win with this poem from May. I'm reviewing you as a member of the WDC Angel Army, celebrating moderators this month.

I've always been intrigued by Bard's Hall but have wondered why I can't figure it out, to participate. Or is it easy? Anyway, I found your poem while perusing the past contest winners.

The prompt by Mary Shelley is a good one. The judge's found your poem most deserving. I take a closer look to examine and see what made it successful. You started with a part of the quote as your lead-in, or hook:

Great and sudden change

What you do here is add imagery to follow: "Like clanging cymbals to the mind," which really grabs me. Then, you hit hard and heavy with 'distortion, disruption, desolation, despair,' each reside on their own line for emphasis (does that sound like the right progression for these words?). You choose hard sounding words with alliteration, a slight vowel change-up midway, that make for good sounding words.

Then, the poet states, "The mind flounders, Unaware." It's after the change that we are hopelessly bound to something like a sea where we are, "Unable to find footing." I would imagine so. Then, "It slips on the precipice of something new, Something not normal. Something out of the blue." I hear alliteration again and this time repetition of a word. We are to wonder what this precipice is. Is it metaphoric? Is it below in the metaphoric foundering that footing is found?

But, imagery changes scenes, "Suddenly thrown into chaos/World turned upside down" and I'm wondering how did it flip? This is a topsy-turvy kind of metaphorical existence. I can see why a person would feel off in a scenario portrayed like this. The poet goes on to say:

Night as Day
Day as Night
Each blended into the other
When will it end.

To me these line mean non-ending. This is what a true nightmare feels like. A great and sudden change can last forever, or what seems like forever, in this surreal existence where we can't fathom where we are or get any control over our situation.

I stop to wonder what Mary Shelley was conveying when she came up with that notion turned idiom. I wonder further how many great minds have tried to interpret it to fit an argument they make for something. It's illuminating.

This was fun. I enjoyed reading and discovering your poem to consider for feedback.

Brian

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