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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4594951
Review #4594951
Viewing a review of:
 The Mayan Conquistadors  [E]
In the 16th century, Sergio's fishing village is attacked, which unleashed a new world.
by Pernell Rogers
Review by Dawn Embers
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)
Hello Pernell Rogers .

My name is Dawn and I'm reviewing your item as a judge for "Journey Through Genres: Official Contest [E]. Thank you for entering the official contest with the genre based prompt. My apologies for the delay in the review.


First Impression: The title is an attention grabber and brought some interest with the description of the item, getting things off to a good start. The characters stand out in particular. Having strong characters followed the story developed, helps to pull the reader through the story.


Prompt: This time around the genre focus was to create an alternative history story. In some ways it can be seen as an easy prompt because an entire genre is allowed but then you have to find a way to narrow things down in order to create a single story. Some histories are easier to see as alternative, depending on the choice made. For this one, even though my history knowledge is waning, I could see the historical side and go from there as we follow through to the alternative approach taken. Nice work.


Story Thoughts: You have a strong story that focuses on a particular story that came a little unexpected. While not obvious it also was a choice that made a lot of sense considering the prompt. You created a character with interest that will bring the reader through the story with curiosity in wondering where things are going to go from the title until the very ent.


Final Comments: I didn't see anything to note on the technical side. You did a good job writing the story and developing both the characters and plot for the short amount of word count allowed. We appreciated the entry months ago for the official site contest. I hope you enjoyed the challenge of the prompt and coming up with the story.

Have fun and keep writing.


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