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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/view_item/item_id/1802073-Deli-Gals
Rated: 13+ · Other · Comedy · #1802073
Funny short story
Deli Gals

  Lunchtime had rolled around for another day and one of my buddies gives me a bored look, "Where are we going for Lunch today?" I rattled off a couple of places and get an answer to all with the same grunts; "Been there, done that" as he rolled his eyes at menu choices offered. Thinking awhile, I finally brightened with a thought. "Hey, let's go to the Deli at the grocery store, they offer a chicken dinner for about 3 bucks nowadays, it's gotta be better than MicD's stuff" My buddy becomes animated now as he says "Yea! That sounds like a great idea!"
 
  So off we go in search of a meal that wasn't as mundane or expensive as our usual fare. Arriving at the store we took our place behind the usual customers looking for a pound of this or a loaf of that and patiently waited our turn.

  The Deli counter was long and had several older gals working with customers, calling the numbers in the order they were dispensed from the ticket machine. "22!"  That’s my number! I shouted and down the long counter she strode.
 
  "What can I get you?" She asked, putting on her best smile for someone who works behind a Deli counter. "What does your chicken dinner have?" I asked as I had never bought one before. "Well sir, we give you a breast, a thigh and a wing with potato salad of your choice (they had 4 of them) and a dinner roll" Not bad, I thought for 3 bucks!  "Ok, give me one of those" and off she went.

I was admiring the chocolate éclairs inside the case when the horrifying incident happened.

Sir! Number 22!  She shouted down the counter.

Yeah! Right here!

Sir! I have no breasts!

Of course, it was at this time everyone at the counter stood silent and turned their eyes toward me, waiting for my response.

And of course, like an idiot I responded

"That's OK, your legs will do"

Immediate pandemonium broke out and everyone roared with laughter as I slunked away, realizing what I had just heard and said.

I didn't get my chicken dinner. And to this day, I still give an evil eye to Deli counters.



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