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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/view_item/item_id/1931881-Staremaster
Rated: E · Non-fiction · Health · #1931881
There should be balance in life; a purpose for exercising = coffee + unlimited donuts.
STAREMASTER by James Fox


A few years ago, when I was supposed to be walking for exercise, I happened to run into a buddy of mine who convinced me to come with him to the nearby coffee shop where we each ordered a cup of coffee and donuts. As we talked and sipped coffee, I had a full view of the street through the shop's window. I noticed that a really buff, fitness-guru type, was jogging along the sidewalk. With real macho styling, he'd removed his shirt to show off his chiseled abs.

As that Mister Macho jogged along, he seemed to be staring at a chick across the street, jogging in the opposite direction. Probably to see if she was gazing in adoration at his Adonis body. Just then, 'whang,' he hit a diagonal cable that braced a telephone pole! The impact literally suspended him in mid-stride. Instinctively he wrapped his arms around the cable. But his momentum spun him nearly two turns around the cable, as he clutched it close.

As he jumped back, he whipped his head left and right, checking to see if anybody had noticed his collision with the cable. Apparently, the sun’s glare off of the shop's windows prevented him from spotting any of us sitting inside,

I hadn't noticed my slightly out-of-shape friend sitting with me was also watching until he growled, "I hope that pulled out his chest hair." We both guffawed as did a half a dozen other patrons, who must have seen Mister Macho hug that cable.

Then we went back to drinking our coffee and eating donuts, having known all along that jogging can be dangerous.




This bit of humor was originally published in Big Rapids Biz Journal beneath an article about a brand-new coffee shop.

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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/view_item/item_id/1931881-Staremaster