35 years old and now a mature

When I look back, I find my life full of ups and downs. Life never went on a straight road and obstacles were in everything that I touched. Those hurdles were either created by me or by surrounding people.

As a child, I missed attention and recognition. My unique qualities were never visible to the outer world. I myself did not realize my strong assets and was made to run over things that I never appreciate. Success was then surely to slip from my hands. But success is a big thing, I forgot happiness as well.
Childhood taught me some biggest lessons of life. But could not change as my life was in others control.

Then teenage was where I was wrong. I was dreaming of future in present. Not only dreaming, my whole focus went there. What is meant to be a part of our future, sometimes can not be attained in present.

After I became an adult though I became wise but the people who were controlling my life, did not change with time. Their mistakes landed me up in a wrong family, where I got married. Sometimes I feel that though we are all human beings but how could we be so different from each other? Different thoughts, views, acts and decisions. Imagine such a big difference of thoughts and two strangers now have to spend their whole life together.
Motherhood is where I am. A mother of two loving and beautiful kids, makes me a proud of myself. When I look at them, I feel how a failure like me could create such lovely two pieces.
I am now at 35 years of my age and now a mature. I call myself a mature because all through my past life I kept on crying for what I did not get. There were things that I wanted and could be attained through hard work and dedication. But at some places I was wrong and at some places situations were wrong. I call myself a mature because I now know what is my life and I have to face it whether I like it or not. I can not change it but can make efforts to make it best. with only those limited resources like we make a new project from useless things.
I call myself a mature because I have stopped thinking about what others think about me. I just care about myself and my life.
I have grown mature because I am learning how a mother forgets about her pain and still look out for kids in any remote situations.

When I write, what is hazy in my mind, comes out like a clear picture. I also want that if someone like me, who feels life is a hell and reads my writeup, should change the mind frame and try giving a new start to their life.