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Rated: XGC · Non-fiction · Other · #2164670
obvious trigger warning is obvious.
Hey, so I'm gonna talk about my self-harm story. So if self-harm triggers you in any way, DO NOT READ ON.


So I started self-harming around the age of 9 or ten. I was being bullied at school and I had heard about cutting on the internet and on TV, so I wanted to see if it helped. I tried to cut with a random razor I found in the bathroom, except it was really dull from being used, so it just scratched me. It hurt like h*ll, but the pain was always gone and any marks too within 30 minutes. So after about two weeks of scratching with a dull, dirty razor, I remembered that my mom had a pack of new razors under her bathroom sink. I thought it would be sharper because it wasn't being used constantly, and I was correct. I bled at my own hand for the first time, and I LOVED IT. I hid the razor in a pencil case in my room and would cut at any chance i could get. I would wear long sleeves in school, but not when I was sleeping because I figured no one would notice. It actually went on for about a month and a half before my mom noticed the red lines on my wrists. She told the whole family and i stopped for about a year. I relapsed but admitted it, and they were understanding both times they found out. But over the years, my family has become more aggressive and less nice about it when they find out.
I still cut on and off a lot, most of the time they don't find out. Here's a list of the places I've cut/scratched. Forearms, Thighs, inner and outer ankles, shoulders, stomach, hips, chest. Multiple times for each one of these areas. It really helps.
I am currently two days clean from any cutting. We all have to start somewhere.
I hope I've helped at least one person by sharing this today. I have more to share, so if you want a part 2, tell me in your reviews. Don't self-harm, It's not worth it, love yourselves, and wear your seatbelts.

ciao,
Jae
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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/view_item/item_id/2164670-My-self-harm-story