They Saw Him Do It

“Hey, Harry! You see that? He’s pretty good, lifted that guys wallet slicker’n snail snot.”

“You have such a way with words Phil. Sometimes your knowledge of the language astounds me.”

“Yeah, I love words so I bought one of them dictionaries and dinosaur things and I study at night.”

“Dinosaur things?”

“Yeah, you know, where you look up a word and it tells you others. Some of them words is pretty hard though so I read them in the dictionary. I lose track sometimes though.”

“I can see where you would. It’s called a thesaurus, it just sounds like it might be a dinosaur.”

“You’re pretty smart too Harry. Do you study words at night too?”

“No phil, I don’t.”

“What’re we gonna’ do?”

“Follow him and take the wallet.”

“Now that’s slick Harry. Hey Harry, you ever hear of prostrate cancer? I got problems peeing and the doc told me I had it.”

“It’s prostate cancer, yes I’ve heard of it. What did the doctor say?”

“He said it’s early... but it was night time?... anyway he said we could nip it in the butt. Will it hurt?”

“It’s nip it in the bud, it means fix it early.”

“Okay. He’s heading down that alley, you want I should go acrosst him like you did that other guy yesterday?”

“It’s accost Phil, and no I don’t. I’ll talk to him. You just be ready if he tries to run.”

“I’ll whack him upside the head if he does, that’s what I’ll do.”

“No Phil, just grab him.”

“But...”

“...Just grab him if he tries to run.”

“Okay.”

“Uh, oh, turn around and walk. I’ll meet you at our coffee shop.”

“What’s up?”

“Cops, just do what I say.”

“Okay Harry, I don’t wanna go to jail again.”