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Tuesday, Jun. 6, 2023

6:00am EDT

Members: 772

Guests: 112

Total Online: 884

Le Voyage Magnifique

by Dave

Rated: 18+ · Book · Writing · #1236257

A log of the magnificent journey across the vast sea of my imagination.

A sig awarded for winning "The Anything Goes Poetry Contest"

A log of our magnificent journey.

Show Recent Comments

10 Most Recent Blog Comments:

Kåre Enga 🇹🇭 Udon Thani

May 19, 2023 at 9:25am
In response to "Poppies"

I do like it. The rhythm is nice. I appreciate bravery/Normandy/memory.

"because" doesn't work for me. No suggestions though.

1 Like

StephBee Salutes 2 Service

Jan 5, 2023 at 5:40pm
In response to "SILENT NIGHT"

My review is based on professional editing points. It is meant to be honest, encouraging, and respectful in accordance with WDC guidelines.

THE POEM
A poem about the nature of the Christmas season.

WHAT I LIKED

I liked how the acrostic of "silent night" painted the beauty of winter.

STRUCTURE

This is an acrostic poem. It is where the first letter of the line spell out a word or a phrase.

MECHANICS

I did not spot any spelling/punctuation mistakes. Good use of WDC ML to make the poem easy to read. Good use of WDC ML.

PARTING THOUGHTS/SUGGESTIONS

I have no other suggestions. Nice word play. You can feel the weather nipping at your cheeks. Good luck in the Bard's Hall Contest.

Reviewed by StephB for the Bard's Hall

** Animated Images For Use By Premium+ Only **

Dave

Jan 3, 2023 at 8:32am
In response to "The Gravel Path"

I am glad you posted this on the forum so everyone else can enjoy it.

1 Like

Kåre Enga 🇹🇭 Udon Thani

Jan 2, 2023 at 3:37pm
In response to "The Gravel Path"

I hurry down a grovel path
to hide from mighty blokes
residing where the mountains scream
at rabid city folks.

I soothe my wounds from acid tongues
among these squirrely butts
and count my blessings every time
White Rabbit brings me nuts.

K.E.

2 Like

Kåre Enga 🇹🇭 Udon Thani

Dec 31, 2022 at 12:04am
In response to "The Telegram"

Nicely done. Eastern Montana has a BIG sky. I live in the west snuggled between mountains.

I loved the openness of Kansas... one reason why I'm going back to Isan in Thailand. "A little bit of who I am" resonates with wide open agricultural areas.

Dave

Dec 10, 2022 at 9:12am
In response to "The Telegram"

Thanks, Kat!

1 Like

Redtowrite

Dec 10, 2022 at 8:51am
In response to "The Telegram"

Paints a breathtaking visual and a feeling of freedom and lightness from our daily troubles. Beautiful writing. Holiday peace to you.

Kat

Kåre Enga 🇹🇭 Udon Thani

Aug 16, 2022 at 6:44pm
In response to "GETAWAY"

So many 'b's. Alliterative on purpose?

The Caymans may not be far enough away. I'd go to Thailand... easier to get lost in a sea of people. Or Colombia.

1 Like

Lazy Writer est 4/24/2008

Aug 6, 2022 at 11:08pm
In response to "The Library"

I liked this poem and enjoyed reading it. I read your notes and now understand why you kept putting the word "here" at the end of the line.

1 Like

Jay O'Toole

Jul 29, 2022 at 11:12pm
In response to "The Brave"

Great poem, Dave.

1 Like

March 10, 2023 at 5:58pm

#1046196

Little John

When Little John, the leprechaun,
published his mystery novel
regarding forest episodes,
he became a celebrity.

Folks all gathered at the tavern
with Little John, the leprechaun,
retelling all the tales he wrote
about the pot of gold and such.

Community citizens praised
his civic generosity,
when Little John, the leprechaun,
shared his royalties with the town.

Because of all that has happened,
every youngster of his clan
wishes they could be as famous
as Little John, the leprechaun.

Notes on the Quatern form of poetry ▼

Like • Comment

March 7, 2023 at 5:10pm

#1046056

Heirlooms

Family secrets
remained hidden in old box
on top closet shelf,

until Mama passed away
without any forewarning.

We found treasures there,
but those late discoveries
did not ease the pain.

Notes on the Oriental Octet form of poetry ▼

Like • Comment

March 6, 2023 at 10:05am

#1046019

TAPS

Quiet descends
around the crowd
gathered to bid farewell
to another soldier.

They stand motionless
while chaplain says his piece
and bugler begins
the final salute.

1 Like • Comment

March 6, 2023 at 9:45am

#1046015

Sleepless

Sleep
deprived
poets keep
schedule contrived
to find time to write,
anytime, anywhere--
in the middle of the night
while lounging in their underwear.

Notes on the Eight-ette form of poetry ▼

1 Like • Comment

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