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  My blog was filled up. I'm too lazy to clean it out. So I started a new one. |
| I have always clung to the motto "Dull women have immaculate homes." I have the cluttered closets and cabinets to prove I'm a slob. I have lots of excuses for why at various stages of my life, unexpected company was an embarrassment to me. I adore Martha Stewart, but aside from a recipe here and there, I am not her disciple. I admired Marie Kondo for a moment, then decided she is just another person to make the average person, more specifically, woman, feel like a failure. Now I have discovered the FLY lady just from reading one of the thousands of articles on clutter. The FLY lady has been around for years, but I only discovered her a few weeks ago. FLY stands for finally loving yourself. The words that really grabbed me and pulled me in went something like this: Your house/garage/ body/whatever didn't get this way overnight. You aren't going to change it overnight. All you can do is a little bit at a time. We must take baby steps, and we forgive ourselves when we mess up. Basically, it's behavior modification, but it's an attitude adjustment, too. You don't get it all at once. You start with a few tiny daily habits. You "declutter" 15 minutes at a time. Drinking water and any kind of exercising are part of the daily habits. The house is divided into 5 zones. I haven't been through zone 1 or 5 yet, so I don't know how that will work out, since the month isn't long enough to do 5 whole weeks. Zone 5 will always be a little short on days, zone 1 may or may not, depending on the calendar. I have noticed a difference in less than two weeks. Heavy duty chemicals or special cleaners are not important. The most important ingredient is elbow grease. She sells mops, rags, and dusters, but they are not essential. You can use anything you like. She even suggests using shampoo left from traveling, or bubble bath someone gave you that you don't like, or other soaps you don't intend to use can be used to clean your bathroom. Another example of this soap is cleaning the kitchen counters. (She says soap is soap.) Use one rag in your soapy water to wipe down your empty counters. Use another plain wet rag to wipe up the soap. Use a third dry rag to wipe up the residue and dry the counter. The FLYing system includes cleaning out your purse every Friday (it's easy when done weekly), getting the trash out of your car on Friday and doing a light dusting. This does not mean dumping your purse or washing your car or vacuuming it weekly. It means getting out receipts, notes, dirty tissues, and for right now, disposable gloves and masks. On Tuesday you pay bills and plan your weekly menus. I haven't gotten through a whole week yet. but I have done 3 days in advance. That allows me to thaw meat out and plan leftovers. I don't know how people who work get through all this, but I'm finding I have more guilt-free time to read or do a crossword. I've mentally checked off my to do list. The house is not perfect. I'm plagued with thoughts of the garage and the shed and the yard. But when I've followed the schedule, I give myself permission to take a break. I was never a perfectionist in action, but most of us are in our minds. If we couldn't fix the whole problem immediately, we got frustrated and gave in. This system allows us to be methodical and make small improvements. We reward ourselves mentally (loving ourselves). Instead of obsessing or complaining to our families, we are more relaxed and can bless them with an organized, comfortable home. |
| DAY 2737 May 15, 2020 Places are opening back up as the restrictions are lifted. How do you feel about this? Do you think we'll be able to return to the way things are? I have mixed feelings. I want people to work again and earn a paycheck. Not everyone had the option to work at home. I want to visit more businesses, but I'm afraid. That leads to why I don't think we'll ever go back completely to the way things were a few months ago. The grocery store seems to have it under control. Both customers and employees are wearing masks and gloves. People are waiting courteously for others to get through the entryway before pushing their own way in or out. But the home and garden stores are just masses of crazy people. No masks, no gloves, brushing up against you. I'm afraid that people will think everything is okay and they won't practice precautions. They will get reckless. And this is pollen season, so people are sneezing and coughing a lot. My next door neighbor is a doctor. She's self-quarantined herself from her family. She's living downstairs, and they live upstairs. They don't eat together or stand in the same room. They meet outside at night around the fire pit so that she can see them and talk to them. She doesn't want to risk their health, especially since her husband is past retirement age. She is exercising caution, so I think we should, too, not to that extreme if we don't work in a medical practice. When the vaccine is available, and there are no new reports of illness or deaths from it, we can begin to relax. But we will have this little fear inside us forever. We can never regain the carefree attitude we once had. I've developed some new attitudes, too. I don't want to play hand bells any longer. I'm going to let my hair grow long again and let the gray come in naturally. I may color it gray once I figure out what my natural gray shade is. I'm rather pleased with my yard work and want to maintain it. And a "company ready" clean house isn't a bad idea either. |
| I don't usually review books . But this one is so bad, I have to get it off my chest. I met the author, at a gathering of older actors. He and his wife were both quite lovely. He had announced plans to write the book, so I promised that I would read it when it came out. I never saw any announcements, but recently tried looking up books by Don Quine. Mind you he's an extremely nice person, and I felt obligated to fulfill my promise to read it. It's called The Dream Virgin, and is available from Amazon. I'm not recommending you read it unless you have particular tastes. It's quite graphic from the very beginning. I barely made it through the prologue, except I remembered my promise to someone I would never see again. The characters were disgusting, ugly, abusive to children, and sick. The first chapter was totally different and introduced the teenager who led dream sessions that the advertisement and book cover led you to believe was the protagonist. It was hard to tell, Not a lot of time was spent on her, but I got the feeling from that chapter that this was going to be about spiritual warfare. I have read some of that before, and it did involve children, and unicorns, and dreaming. So I kept reading. But I was wrong. No spiritual warfare. In fact, the dreaming part wasn't well developed. There were so many characters that I felt I needed a list with names and descriptions to keep track of who was who and how they fit in. There wasn't a lot of character development, except maybe the grandfather, and unseen by the reader, he made some changes and went from almost empathetic to unlikable again. The truth is I never felt any empathy to any of the characters. Too much happened too fast and was sometimes confusing. Even if the gross stuff weren't there, it was simply poorly written. The gross stuff just kept coming. Cannibalism, violence, drugs, nudity, etc. If you like a series of events like that, this might be your book. There was certainly no one working for right or morality, no real heroes. There weren't any direct sex scenes, unless you call mutilating a naked body sex; it doesn't count in my book. There was lots of profanity. This was obviously self-published. Although four people were acknowledged as proofreaders, professional proofreaders would have known the difference between quite and quiet, which form of a pronoun to use, and the rules of objects of prepositions. They'd know how to use commas, too. I suppose every writer needs to read a bad book occasionally. I learned that characters need to be more in depth. There shouldn't be too many story lines to follow, unless you're doing a James Michener style epic. Regardless of the genre, this one wasn't mine, the story should be cohesive and have a satisfying ending. This one left things dangling, so another could follow in a sequel. I won't be reading it. |
| No matter what else I do, I have to stop and prepare a decent dinner for my 91 year old dad. He fends for himself for breakfast and lunch. He is a retired butcher, and wants meat at dinner. He also likes fresh vegetables. He gets his fruit at breakfast. It's too bad he's had to give up gardening, but I can't plow the raised vegetable bed. I can pull the weeds, but I can't prepare the soil. One night recently, I opened a can of Julienne beets. It was a well balanced meal, but the beets brought to mind stories I've never heard him tell before. I knew he liked all kinds of beets. He explained, piecemeal, that during rationing, his mother kept all the canned vegetables under her bed. One night she opened two cans of Julienne beets. He didn't tell me if that was all they had, or where Grandpa was. He just said that he, his little sister-maybe 11 or 12, little brother-maybe six or seven went outside thinking they had just had Christmas dinner! My dad is quite hard of hearing, nerve deafness so hearing aids don't help. I have to yell at him to have a conversation. I finally got him to say it was rationing during or before the war. He was only a baby in the depression. They received coupons, not like food stamps, but actual coupons for specific items. Milk, cheese, eggs, cans of fruit or vegetables, meat, booze, etc., they all required coupons. Every citizen regardless of financial status had to get coupons or they couldn't shop. Grandma traded with the neighbors for things they preferred over things they didn't. He didn't know why she kept them under the bed. I think maybe she was afraid someone would steal them. No one locked their doors in those days. It brought up a few other little memories that he shared. I've heard lots of his stories repeatedly, but these were new to me. It's funny that one little vegetable could open up a closed corner of your memory. I was in awe of the idea. I thought of going to the store the previous week and finding the shelves bare of flour and cornmeal. Who knew that many people still exist who know how to cook from scratch? Then it hit me, there aren't that many, but the ones who do know, are hoarding these products. We all know the shortage of toilet paper, paper towels, Ramen noodles, and certain cleaners. If we had rationing early in this process, no one would be hoarding anything, rich or poor. You'd still have to pay the normal price, but you'd only get what was allowed for your household. Everyone who lived through rationing now would be old men like my dad or they would have been babies and have been unaware of what was going on. In those days they didn't ration to prevent hoarding or to ensure that everyone ate. The war effort was the priority. Metal had to be used for aircraft and ammunition. Food had to go to the military first. It's hard for us to imagine rationing when we've lived through such times of prosperity and choice. |
| My story would be more about things gone wrong. My dad planted butterfly bushes, which we have always loved because they really do draw butterflies. The bushes have been full and spreading. At least until the last few years. I've been trimming away many dead branches. Last year I was checking for the parasitic vines that wrap around your shrubs and trees and peonies and choke them out. I untwined a lot from one butterfly bush and traced the pieces to the ground. Some very large pieces of wood broke off. The second one, on the other side of the house, had dead branches, but no vines. This year, I have trimmed away a whole trash can of dead pieces from just one bush, and broke off more to the ground. I pulled all the weeds from around the bottom, but put fresh mulch around the bottom. I looked it up, and I believe both bushes have root rot. Don't know what to do for it. He also planted a hedge of Japanese hollies along the street, which he keeps trimmed. I noticed yellow spots on them while I was weeding. I looked that up. We have an iron deficiency which is easily remedied. I'm just afraid to go to that kind of store during the semi-quarantine to get what I need. We also have a huge holly tree on one side of the garage, and a compact holly hedge on the other side of the garage. They are beginning to look the same. The acid soil we have needs some doctoring. We can't grow rosemary. It smells great for a while, but won't last all year. I have pots of sage and chives which grow back every year on their own. I planted a long narrow box of flower seeds and placed it on my deck railing. Some of them were beginning to grow. Tonight during dinner we watched two doves in the box pecking away. They were cheap seeds, so they probably cost less than bird seed. Deer eat the tulips, hostas, and blackberries. Also, cypress shrubs-mine look like topiary, but only to the height of a deer's head. One year my dad planted a voodoo plant in the flower bed. Last year, I went on the warpath against these invasive plants. I pulled at least 200 and put them in the trash. Dad would have thrown them in the compost, but I know they would have survived and multiplied. I think I won. I have not seen a single voodoo plant this year, and have weeded that bed several times already. At a different location, I planted mint. Do not plant mint, bamboo, or voodoo, unless you are prepared for them to take over everything. They're like kudzu, or dandelions, very invasive and very sturdy. I do pretty well with irises and marigolds. |
| My very kind neighbor just gave me a big box of organic kale from her garden. I trimmed it up, washed off the bugs and dirt, picked off the flower buds and cooked it until it was about 1/4 the size. I only used a pinch of salt. Unfortunately, it was beginning to get old, therefore the flowers, and some of the stems, even though small, remained very tough. It's still delicious. You just have to pull the pieces that look as stiff as uncooked spaghetti off your plate. I always worry that I missed a bug or two, but then again, they cook apart. That might be added protein. I'll fix some Southern spoon bread to go with it. I was shocked at the grocery store last week to discover the shelves of flour, all kinds, were bare. All the yellow cornmeal was gone, too, which is what I wanted. They had white cornmeal, so I got one. My spoon bread will be light colored, but will still be good. Thanks, neighbor, for sharing your garden with me. |
| I have to say it's easier to keep the house straight when the children don't visit on the weekend. Is the trade-off worth it? I like having just routine clean-up instead of massive scrubbing and moving furniture to pick up candy and chips and little toys that are hiding from me. But I miss them. I think about them a lot. They love to dig, so I think of them when I'm trying to fill the wheelbarrow with mulch from the big pile. They could be helping me load that wheelbarrow and emptying it! Of course, that's only a few minutes and still won't stop them from taking the knickknacks off the shelves and carrying them outdoors. Oh, yeah. I haven't picked up odds and ends, tools, etc., out in the far ends of the yard. I haven't been reading more than usual. I haven't written more. I have reviewed a little more. So what am I doing with my time? I guess watching the news. We aren't going anywhere in the car, so I'm not losing time driving anywhere. Or using gas. But I am fixing balanced, nutritional meals, maybe more than usual. I guess I want more productivity. I want to see the results of no company and no errands, but it feels stagnant. I probably am surfing the Net more. Or watching more movies, old ones. We could be doing this a few more months. Maybe I'll do something creative before we're out and about again. |
| I'm staying in. Although, I'm not out and about a lot normally, knowing that I shouldn't go out makes me want to go that much more. I usually try to avoid going to the store until I have to. Now I'm making a mental list everyday of things I just have to have now! I did drive out to the mailbox at the shopping center to mail some bills. The carrier in our neighborhood is extremely unreliable. I took my 91 year old father, just to prevent cabin fever. He wanted to ride around and look at the new construction on our mountain, so we spent an hour almost just looking at new homes, bigger than ours, but with much smaller yards. Dr, Oz says that if you go out somewhere you should take your shoes off at your door. Leave them there for 24 hours. There's a lot to remember. Shoes will hold the virus 24 hours; so will cardboard, like your Amazon deliveries, or pizza boxes. He says for food deliveries have containers at the door before arrival and a plastic trash bag. Pay over the phone and include the tip, so the delivery guy doesn't linger. At your door, transfer the pizza to a pan and discard the box in the bag which you will leave outside until tomorrow. For Chinese or other foods, wear gloves to open the food containers and empty into bowls or platters. Discard containers in bag. He says it's not the food prepares you need to be wary of, it's the delivery person who has handled the containers just before you get them. There are times for copper and plastic and wood which I can't remember. Wood I believe is safer. Fabrics will only hold the virus 7 or 8 hours, so change clothes if you went to work or to the store immediately, but you don't have to launder right away. There have been some important people still working-first responders, pharmacy employees, grocery clerks, and medical personnel. Don't forget truck drivers. They sit isolated in a cab for long hours, so they have been able to safely keep working. Without them, we'd never get the TP or water or potato chips replenished. They still need a place to shower, gas up the trucks and get food, so truck stops have been fully operational. Then there's the UPS guys. Mine usually drops off everyone's boxes up near the door. Everyone in the neighborhood has a long driveway; mine is straight and not that long. I looked everywhere around my house and garage and couldn't find my package due Sunday night. My dad found it dripping wet out on the street the next morning. They never ring the bell or make personal contact, so what was he afraid of? These are extraordinary times (I know you haven't heard that anywhere) and will never be forgotten by those who survive. It's bringing out the worst in some people, and the best in others. We each have to do our part, to act as we are called. |
| “Prayer for a Pandemic” (not my words, but so good, I wanted to share) “Prayer for a Pandemic” by Dr. Cameron Wiggins Bellm of Seattle, Washington: May we who are merely inconvenienced Remember those whose lives are at stake. May we who have no risk factors Remember those most vulnerable. May we who have the luxury of working from home Remember those who must choose between preserving their health or making their rent. May we who have the flexibility to care for our children when their schools close Remember those who have no options. May we who have had to cancel our trips Remember those that have no safe place to go. May we who are losing our margin money in the tumult of the economic market Remember those who have no margin at all. May we who settle in for a quarantine at home Remember those who have no home. As fear grips our country, Let us choose love. During this time when we cannot physically wrap our arms around each other, Let us yet find ways to be the loving embrace of God to our neighbors. Amen. |
| Right after I wrote my blog Thursday night, they closed the city schools for two weeks. I live just across the county line, but they then announced all the schools in the state would be closed for two weeks. I starting getting notices Friday that the theater where I volunteer has canceled almost everything through April 5 and many things beyond that. (The schools in my area are letting the custodians and others work to earn a paycheck by sanitizing the schools while they are empty.) I took my dad to two grocery stores Friday to get our St. Patrick's Day items on sale, and the regular things at one of them. These stores were jam packed with people, a lot of the elderly wearing masks, most people wiping down their carts. All the Ramen noodles were gone! Bread was picked over, except for the bakery. Canned vegetables had empty shelves. I got one of the last bags of dry beans. Cleaning supplies were running low. Yogurt was almost depleted. The seafood section was completely empty and lights turned off. They still have frozen fish and shrimp. I went to the drug store to pick up two prescriptions today. The store was very busy, but not as many as usual were at the pharmacy counter. Next door, the Tractor Supply store had a large crowd looking at chickens in the parking lot; the baby chicks are kept inside. That crowd didn't mind brushing up against strangers. On the good news side, Friday morning, a prominent doctor announced on TV that Roche laboratories has improved the testing of COVID-19. Once they receive the test, the patient can get results in four hours. So advancements are being made daily. I am confused about obtaining a test. Many places are having drive up places to get a test, so you have minimal exposure to others. I realize they are waving co-pays, but don't they still have to process paperwork. And is a prescription needed? The same doctor said that you should be able to get a test on demand, just because you don't feel well, or you think you were exposed to someone. That leads me to believe you need a doctor's order to get a test. This doctor pointed out that you can get an HIV test just to be safe; you don't have to feel sick. Every death saddens us. We hate what this is doing to the economy. Some people feel that not enough has been done and not soon enough. Others complain that too much was done too soon. Nothing will please everybody. The most heroic actions will not please everybody. A large part of personal safety falls on us. We have to practice hygiene properly, refrain from vacations and stay away from crowded places. I am concerned about how many businesses will close this spring, and how many people won't have jobs once this is over. Lower taxes will help those who keep their jobs. Meanwhile they are forced to use sick time, vacation leave and holidays to help cover the time off. The year has just begun. We're not having church Sunday. It's canceled in keeping with the rest of the state and local churches, not out of fear, but with a concern for the safety of others. Many church goers are elderly and in the high risk group. They're going to attempt some live stream thing and let us know how to get it by tonight. |
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