Sorry I've been absent guys. I promise, I'll get back into the swing......just after the first of next month. (When finals are finally over!) Then, Calculus will no longer rule so much of my time!
Thank you to all those that took the time to respond/show concern and caring during this time. I apologize, I am still not sure I am going to be doing much, but I am hoping reading some things will help me find a path to some sense of healing. The hardest parts are coming home, going to bed, and waking up. Simply because, she isn't there. I still picture her everywhere, and I am having a difficult time getting the image of her lying prone out of my mind. I am forever grateful my wonderful husband has been patient and understanding. So when the tears start falling, he just holds me. He admits he expects it to take a bit before the things I see won't hurt quit as much. So today, I am going to attempt to do some reading on here. And at some point, attempt to do homework. I missed some last weekend, but just couldn't stay focused. Thank you all for you compassion.
I somehow missed your original post on this. I am so sorry, it is terrible going through this. I've done it too many times to count, and it never, ever gets easier. The only thing I can say is that with a little time, the pain will ease a bit. You will always miss your baby, though.
Thank you so much. All I am doing right now is functioning. Beyond that is asking for too much just yet. I am trying very hard to be patient with the others, and have not been able to remove her items from our bedroom. It feels like I am trying to forget her by doing that, and it is heartbreaking. So, just day by day, and I have given up on attempting to not shed tears. It will happen. I will get the forever ink done in two weeks, and I hope it will help with the process. She will never be forgotten, and she impacted so many. She was amazing, as I am sure most people believe each of theirs to be. Thank you so much for your kind words. I can only hope to do her memory justice.
My heart is shattered as I come to grips with the horror of reality. We received bad news about my beloved pitty baby on Saturday. Today, is the final day of spoiling her and I must give her the peace that she has earned. She will have all of her finals on earth today, then she will move on and be pain free and healed forever. Inside of me, I feel as if my heart is being shredded as I try to keep from falling to pieces. It was the hardest decision to make as one would look at her and never know she has been fighting cancer. The cancer has reached her chest and is putting pressure on her heart and lungs. The tumor in her leg bone has caused her bone to be nearly paper thin. The risk of causing more pain if it breaks is too much for me to bear. I would never forgive myself if I chose to be greedy and keep her here with that risk being so great. Instead, I gave her the best weekend I could, allowed the kids and other family to show her their love, and will take her to find peace this afternoon. If only I could stop time.......If only the 4 months past prognosis would have reversed the effects. If only we didn't have to let go of those that have taught us so much in such a short time. She will carry a large piece of my heart with her today, and I will fight to be a tenth as brave as she has been.
I am fighting the tears again as I write this, and I will pull all of the poems for her in the next few days into a seperate folder. For those of you with furbabies, love them....spoil them... our time with them is so much shorter than it seems.
Thank you. I have had 4 months to come to terms with it, but I haven't. And to watch her play with our son yesterday morning, and wag her tail, makes it so much harder. But then, to see her limp back to the room and sleep most of the day, I know she is in pain, she is just hiding it well. And I don't want to risk more pain. She has been such an amazing friend and companion. She has taught me so much and I would never be able to repay or show her how much she is loved. She got a scrambled egg for breakfast, and she will have carrot cake before the time comes. With tears falling into her coat, I will hug her all I can.
Celeb, I am so sorry you're going through this, even more for sorry your pitty baby and their pain. We're all here for you, believe that. We lost a beloved Akita to Cancer five years ago this month. We never knew until she started limping a bit. Never felt any tumors, nothing. But she started limping, so we took her in. She had bone cancer throughout her body. Lost her that day it was so bad. I feel for you, I really do. It's so hard to lose those you love. Take care of yourself. Time won't heal this loss, and you'll always treasure your time with them. We do. Again, take care of yourself.
Celeb, so sorry to read what you are going through with your fur baby. We love them so much that our hearts are bound to break when they are hurting. Just know you are doing the right thing, the most loving for her. Big and .
Hey y'all! I promise, I'm still alive. Well, medically speaking. My brain has been forced into a coma I think. Sorry I haven't been on. This week has been a helluva ride and full of potholes. I'm gonna take the rest of the weekend to recoup, but I'll be back next week to try my hand at all the challenges. Hope all of you are doing great!
I really haven't forgotten everyone. I haven't been as active as I would like, but last week and this week are filled with studying for tests. Not counting, Calc still has most of my brain cells curled into a fetus position.
Now, in saying that, there are so many things ya'll can do for me! Go check all of these out. I'd love to see some new or old, heck just lots of names, posted in these!
I think I'm still in solitary on Cloud 9. I've been pretty absent-minded lately, but I don't think Cupid is releasing me just yet. Come visit me!
Plus the tons and tons of monthly contests that are still going on. I could go on...and on.... and on....but I'm sure the moderators and regulators and all that have some kind of limit on how long our posts are.
With that in mind, I'm going to crawl back to my solitary hole up here on Cloud 9, feed my face with something sweet (you know, Cupid insists his prisoners get a little chubby in their stay) and attempt to get back to studying for this Finance exam that I plan to take Friday, and alternate with this Management Skills that I will probably attempt to brave on Sunday. Anyone want to bring me something other than candy hearts and chocolate, or at least pick up a heart or two here, would be appreciated. Maybe I can trade it for a steak! Right now, I need to figure out what f'''(x)=(4x^5+2x^2+1) is. Thankfully, that one is an easy one!
Well, you got the first derivative! I wish all the equations are that easy! Gonna have to get some recruitment help tonight. I think I may have looked at the newest section a bit too long.
Ok, ok. What's with everyone hiding? I mean, I know it's the first of the love month, but really? Come on, check out a few of these and join the fun!
Cupid is ALWAYS looking for new....um, hearts ...to join the rest of us on Cloud 9. (And I'm still looking for someone to bail me out of this insanity! Still stuck in Solitary, and I've been super quiet lately.)
Sorry I haven't been on much. This weekend was a very frustrating weekend, and the day hasn't gone much better. School has me feeling overwhelmed, and this weekend I was ready to give in. Elementary Calculus is really pushing me to give in. It is hard to keep going when we are only a few sections in, and I cann't really grasp the homework. And to make matters worse, with the other 3 classes, and full-time work, I am nearly ready to give it up. I try really hard to keep the 3.1 GPA that I have been carrying for the last 4 semesters, but this class is the one that has me wondering if I should. SO, in light of this, forgive me if I'm not in the participating mood. I'm busy having a pity part while kicking myself in the ass and trying to keep my spirits up and stay motivated to finish this. All conflicting emotions and there's been plenty of tears over the weekend. Hopefully, hubby can help me figure it out tonight. Otherwise, the rest of this semester may not go so well.
hang n there. I could only take two hard classes and filled in with PE> Just do your best. My son had to drop his Hebrew class, couldn't lesrn it fast enough. Take time to ponder on it. but please don't give up on school. Love, LinnAnn
I been there before. I will pray for you. Keep pushing. Do not give up on school. Persevere! Persevere! Change your way of thinking. Ask God for help. Read Philippians 4:13. Bevenciurage
Thank you all. I managed to get through the first quiz in Calculus, although I don't feel that I really completely understand the Chain Rule of derivatives as much as the rest. I only hope continuing forward will help. My other class still doesn't look real good, but at least the professor found the time to tell me "I'm sure you will do fine," when I asked for assistance. So, at this point, I think I am just hoping for a passing grade in both. I'm still feeling overwhelmed and have decided that I will spend a little more time each night of the week working on those two and hope it helps keep me from doing so much cramming and being frustrated. I appreciate all the support in thoughts, prayers, and feedback!
*Rubs eyes sleepily* What? Where am... Oh, yeah. I must have slept hard after all that studying. I forgot that I'm still hanging out in Airhead Prison on Cloud 9 here at:
Well, I guess I have enough time to myself this morning that I can get some work done and then start studying again. Hopefully this morning Cupid will let me hang out with my buddy Lilith of House Martell so we can go stalk Jaeyne of the Free Fab Five. I think if she sees her name enough, maybe she will join us....or bail us out, one of the two. I hear the others beginning to stir. They ate so much sweets last night that they were pinging off the cell bars until early morning! After looking at so many heart arrows.....it has made me wonder. Has anyone else noticed that the hearts are shaped a lot like Cupid's hiney?! Hmmm....maybe it was the studying last night, and the candy hearts that's getting to me. Or maybe, that dang Red M&M poked me with one of his poison arrows. You know, he is trying to take out people to get close to Hannah ♫♥♫. I'm telling you, that Red isn't the one that you want to get tangled up with!
I'm telling you, Red must have snuck in here sometime last night and poked me with one of his arrows. I think it's a jealousy poison, but really, I'm not sure. I just know I feel a little off kilter this morning. But honestly, have you really ever looked at those hearts???
Well, looks like I'm in jail. Since I'm in solitary for the night, I'm gonna get a bit of studying done. Please, don't think about bailing me out tonight! I need to get 2 chapters read, and it's super quiet in here. I think Cupid is enjoying the chocolate for now. And my cell mates seem to be planning a BIG party. But, if anyone wants to bail me out by Tuesday, that'd be great since I have class (and a quiz) that morning. In the meantime, be careful about visiting:
*She sits in the corner of the cell, her tear stained face illuminated by the beam of a full moon. She silently lifts the harmonica to her mouth and begins to play.
My brain hurts! Between work and school, I think this week is just trying to kill me. Okay, maybe not that extreme, but I swear Jack and Rose are calling my name! They keep saying tomorrow night they are holding me hostage!
Maybe, just maybe, I need to go check myself in at
Excuse me, Hannah ♫♥♫, can you tell me...do you let your prisoners out for some time in libraries and such? I know you are super busy and all, but I'll be sure to bring some ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
So, I debated on even mentioning this. Not because I am not honored and proud, but more because I don't really advertise these writings. They are on the adult side of things. So, with that being said, I am still very happy to announce that one of my adult writings was honored with a Quill nomination. Don't worry, I'm staying with the 18&under post. But, it's in my adult folder.
So to the person that nominated my short story "Bath time", I thank you!!!
** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
I'll advertise them! If you enjoy the genre of writing and are of the appropriate age - take a visit over there. The whole folder is really, really good.
Ok, this is one for EVERYONE to jump on. I am needing help. I am looking into writing something that I have never done before through my college studies. It is Creative Nonfiction. Does anyone have some on here they would be willing to let me take a look at??
I'm sure there is/used to be a creative non-fiction contest. It might be worth searching the site, or trying the Non-technical support forum "Non-Technical Support Forum" to ask for information.
And....it begins again! Ok, so forgive me if I'm just kind of present (or not) today. Classes have started, and I already have issues with one. How can you take an online class when the only thing online is the syllabus?!?! So, work is keeping my time today and I'll knock out some of the school stuff this evening before heading to shoot at pool league. But the books will be ordered at least! *Sigh, welcome back Monday*
Do what you have to do! Catch up when you can! The beginning of a semester is always rough - new schedules, new teachers, new subjects...things will get better once you settle in. You totally got this girl!!!!
Yep, I did it. I didn't pay attention to the hours/days for one of my classes. It's a hybrid, and I just figured I needed the class and I could make 3 in class days. What I DIDN'T pay attention to, the first day is the same as the first day for my Calculus class. . So, now, on Tuesday, I will not only be late to work, I will have to leave early. Well, I guess the good part is I'm salary, and the better part is my boss understanding. He just said, "Do what you have to. It's all about bettering yourself." So, this evening it's looking at the books/applications needed and getting ready for the new semester to kick off. Although I'm not getting my Associates at the end of this semester, I'm still plugging away. Part of these credits are just going towards the Bachelors.
Now, for the positive note: Looking forward presents a better view than always looking behind.
I'm going for another semester on the Dean's List. Study hard!
I was rushing to get the classes submitted and totally didn't pay attention. So, yeah, I felt the headbang this morning when I looked. Really felt foolish.
As far as the Dean's List, I didn't get to last semester because I had to drop a class and it put me below 12 hours. But my grades were still high enough. This semester, I'm not dropping classes, and I'm going for the 4th or 5th time. I'll take it! One day, I hope to make President's list, but as a full time employee and student, I'll take the Dean's List.
In and out, in and out. I haven't forgotten about ya'll! Just been busy. Trying to get classes scheduled, back to work today (we all know what that's like after taking time off) and tending household. But, I'm going to be back into the swing of things this week. So, hang in there and I'll get back to everyone as quickly as possible!
By the way...... HAPPY NEW YEAR ALL!!!!!
P.S.
Thank you to the person/persons that nominated my story
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for a Quill and also my portfolio! I'm honored!!!!
I know!!! I am so amazed! It was really the first short story I attempted, and to think, I had just made the promise I would submit one. I didn't expect to win, nor to get a nomination!!!
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has a great short story prompt at: 
...to join the rest of us on Cloud 9. (And I'm still looking for someone to bail me out of this insanity! Still stuck in Solitary, and I've been super quiet lately.) 
I hear the others beginning to stir. They ate so much sweets last night that they were pinging off the cell bars until early morning! After looking at so many heart arrows.....it has made me wonder. Has anyone else noticed that the hearts are shaped a lot like Cupid's hiney?! Hmmm....maybe it was the studying last night, and the candy hearts that's getting to me. Or maybe, that dang Red M&M poked me with one of his poison arrows. You know, he is trying to take out people to get close to Hannah ♫♥♫ 
to ask for information. 
So, this evening it's looking at the books/applications needed and getting ready for the new semester to kick off. Although I'm not getting my Associates at the end of this semester, I'm still plugging away. Part of these credits are just going towards the Bachelors. 
I'm going for another semester on the Dean's List. 
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