Don't feel bad, moat of van goh came from his nightmares and devinchi created what he dreamed. I write from my heart and you should too,If I could rant(just not me) I qould have a log book of rants. If you look at my work Grammer and dialog is in need of help,my suggestion right what's on your mind
What is the book that draws you to read it? Think of your first read in life, mine was a cs Lewis book my sister left on the kitchen table(the lion the witch and the wardrobe)
Try from there I can email a list of books to help if you want just let me know
Hello I am azrael2915, I write in fantasy/adventure. Try thinking about what kind of things you like reading;
1.anime
2.current news
3.national geographic (My favorites came from the Shannara series and c.s lewis
I usually don't work with poetry but this one reminds me not to give up on our dreams. It is true that as we grow up we tend to forget what we dreamed of doing with our lives then we let the worries of life get to us. keep up the good work and keep dreaming
Nice work, immortality is like a two edge sword on one side you can help the world but stay too long and suffer in limbo. He came a long way and seen a lot but,my question what made him like this? This would make a freat story because what made immortal and can undo it
beautifully composed,a dreamscape in-between life and death that stills the senses. I like how the flutes represent reality trying to reach him. you described the view of a lost well and i would like to see your pov on the psyche of a multi personality
This is a tale that passed the test of time and will be there still. It's amusing to see it as a madlib, this has got a lot of potential. Keep up the good work.
"your review is granted"
Nice job on the poem. You speak of chose and the other reaction of what we don't take, a double edge blade has a positive and negative reaction on ether side. You should write a story of mirror twins using this poem, who knows you might be able to create an eye opener. No spelling mistakes that I can see.
Well now a WOW poem;
You paint the worgen well in a simple way.No spelling errors, and I would like to more WOW stuff.( FOR THE HOARDE!!!)
always write from your heart.
Part 1- Great job painting the past scene and raw fear of a nightmare. Even if the storm was coming she knew to run from a wild water elemental, I love the suspense. The destruction of the home her family is in can be describe, as the wood splinters and flies as the force of the water hits it, giving an image of the wave's power. no spelling errors for me to note.
Part 2- nice job on the 6 year time change with her, in a world you describe as unstable. What are the Elders waiting for? and what holds her to that village? No spelling mistakes seen, and the main thing you have going here can be called dark.
write from your heart.
This is a good poem of what is mankind's short lived life. you paint the picture well: like a cat toying with a mouse. So does death tease us and challenge our being, no spelling mistakes that i see and if this is the path you choose I suggest reading Edger Allen Poe and others of his dark realm of poems and short stories.
always write from your heart.
Ah the raven a bird black as night, good poetry ,( question is where are the periods and commas?) You have set a beautiful stage and your words speak the fears of man kind, keep moving forward with this and always write from your heart. I would like to see more, I suggest reading Edger Allen Poe cawed the raven nevermore nevermore. He is one of the dark masters when it comes to setting a stage.
Great setting and plot, good opening (how do you get the dialog to work?). The DAB Cortex tech is a something the can turn to their advantage, with those egos it can be used to control the mass. To indent a paragraph try hitting the Tab button, as your story continues I suggest you add location for where the characters are meeting or going. All and all your doing good so far, if you can I suggest Microsoft Office/Word.
Write from your heart and always remember to be honest to yourself and others.
Beautiful work and so far good start of a dark story. You describe the scene very well, and the view off the cliff must be a sight.
1) paragraghs 1 & 2,
You have no spelling errers here and I would say you need to describe the city a little more. Like any bridges, guards on payroll, and what does the streets look like?.
2) paragraghs 3 & 4, no spelling mistakes and I got a few questions. What does the palace look like?, are there any guards with the queen?, and how tall is the wall?
3) paragraghs 5 & 6, no spelling mistakes, does he have anything on him and what was taken?, what was the first thing he saw going into the city as the gates closed?
Please do continue, hope these suggestions and questions help.
Let me start with the fact that this is a nice point of view.Well said well put, but lets see to the title:
Is this a dream state or nightmare?
Walking thru life blind or wide eyed?
answer these and then respond at [item:1760720} and Ican help you with a few titles to choose from.If you need advice go to "Invalid Item"
Yuo have been ambushed and reviewed by an elven scout, here's celebrating you.
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Hate:how much you dislike someone, is an intresting point of view.I like the fact that it shows how that poetry can come from even your deepest emotions and feelings.Just don't let it sit there and rot from the inside/out.Keep doing this and see what kind of portfolio you can build.Look at Edger Allon Poe:The Raven; it's filled with emotion.You could learn alot from him.(Cawed the raven:never more,never more.)
** Image ID #1759081 Unavailable ** Here is a CSFS Elf Raid to celebrate you.
You got a good start here.The plot looks fairly set up, now work with your characters and see where it takes you. Look at my Zeglar, it is just starting and my characters speak for themselves. Listen to your characters and see their world, and by doing so you will be able to create a full world of epic adventures. See you around the hall.
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You are headed in the right dirction of a great battle.One of strength, and one of agility fighting one another for place.Nice touch with the age difference and weapon choose.If the man had lived would he lived in peace with the figure?The figure a young druid or mage?Love To see more.
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Drinking can be a problem if you let it.Do it what your doing now, share it thru your writing.If can be read about i can be shared.I know its difficult to overcome small to large problems and it will be awarding in the end.So don't give up.
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Good start shadow mancer,if I were you I would pick one of his girls.I know evil thought but what would you do?keep going with this piece.This could become epic as the Shannara series.
1)You should think of a name for this story
2)try listining to your characters it helps in development.keep work at your goal.
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