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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/depayne
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6 Public Reviews Given
6 Total Reviews Given
Public Reviews
1
1
Review by DePayne
Rated: E | (5.0)
I loved this story!! It kept me wanting to read more the entire time. Great descriptions made it easy to visualize in my head.

Keep up the great work!!

DePayne
2
2
Review by DePayne
Rated: E | (5.0)
Jackilyn,

I enjoyed this read very much! You did a great job creating a lasting visual impression throughout the entire piece.

I could relate very easily to the haunting of yesterdays ghosts and how we all manage to not only survive to see tomorrow, but realize that every experience we have lived through helped to make us who we are today.



3
3
Review by DePayne
Rated: 13+ | (3.5)
Wow!! Great story line!! It kept my attention from the opening right up to the end. You did a great job combining so many common family issues in one story.This story has awesome potential!! There are many typos. I would suggest reading back through your entire story, one sentence at a time to check for mistakes. Some are simple grammatical errors, and some are words in the wrong place in the sentence. At times, it was a little confusing switching from Grampa to John. Please don't think I am being harsh. I love the story!! If you would like, after you go back through and make any corrections you can find, feel free to e-mail me, and I will be glad to help you with any additional corrections.

Keep writing!!
DePayne
4
4
Review of What If?  
Review by DePayne
Rated: E | (5.0)
Mary-I think this is great!! It says a lot about what kind of friend you are. People need to count their friends as extra blessings in their lives because for some people, a true friend is the only one that will have your back in your time of need.. Great job!
Thanks-DePayne
5
5
Review by DePayne
Rated: E | (4.5)
I really liked the feeling this writing provoked while reading it. I can certainly relate to the uncertainties that we are all faced with, but it's nice to have a little reminder that we need to take the opportunity to make the most of every day and tell those closest to us our most intimate feelings. There are a few typos. On the first line the word "within" has transposed letters. Also, the word "uncertainty" is misspelled twice. These are the only typos I found, but that didn't take away from the overall enjoyment for me.
Nicely done. Keep posting!
DePayne
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