Huh, London? That is freaking cool! I live in boring freaking Alabama, but I'll get out one day. I understand what you mean about finding time to write. I'm using a school computer as well and I'm being home schooled because of the pandemic here. Summer break starts tomorrow so I will probably never use this site ever again after today. I glad your depression is kind of getting better. I guess that's all I commented on this for was to tell you that. I know from experience the going through this must be hard but one way or the other, it will stop hurting after a while. I know you have probably been told this from a hundred other people but, god loves you so he isn't making you suffer for no reason. He has a plan so just remember, the pain won't last to much longer. :) Have a good life -Destiny Nickelson.
Ps. here's all of my points, sense Im never going to use them. :)
I like this, more or so. Something that caught my eye was that you ended the whole thing with a question. That was genius. I gave your readers space to use there own imagination. I cant wait to read the rest of it. *Hint *Hint :)
Okay, I guess Im reviewing all of your work. lol. So, I like this one because It expresses all of Mara's feelings and emotions as the story escalates. Also, I think I have already mentioned something about this, but maybe you could write another story that tells about Negi and Mara after this story ends. You know? Like, what happened's with their relationship? And do they stay together? That what be great! Keep Writing, your good.
You executed your words well but Im a little confused on whats going on, if it was not for the title I would be utterly lost on what your trying to discuss. Other than that I loved to way you expressed your words.
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