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3 Public Reviews Given
10 Total Reviews Given
Public Reviews
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Review of Coyote Waits  
Review by Kabit
Rated: E | (5.0)
I like how it plays between Coyote and Prey (a rabbit in my mind, not a roadrunner ;). Not naming the prey is interesting, but I think it makes the metaphor to the traps of life too obvious - though I can't fault you.

I can almost feel the trap the coyote sets and the chase that gives way. I really like this one.
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Review by Kabit
Rated: ASR | (3.5)
This is a great start! The events are interesting and complex and this could become an excellent story!

Because this is based on true events you might not want to diverge too much. This doesn't mean you can't be very liberal with descriptions and dialog (both of which need to be added). I suggest you use this as an outline and add in the interaction that will make it into a great short story / novella.

Good luck with it! I'm looking forward to seeing more :)
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Review by Kabit
Rated: 18+ | (4.0)
Wow! I really liked the premise of this story. I think there should be a little more inner conflict about the transformation, otherwise it seems a little gimmicky. It's also a little slow just after the transition when Tracy is going to school, having period, etc.

The conflict between Tracy and Victor is interesting and it seems like this is a good start! Looking forward to the next chapter (and I'll be seeking it out if already written ;))
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