I finished reading this story over the weekend and once again i couldn't put it down until I finished it. i can see what you mean about adding Choby in as a last minute character and how it doesn't relate but it doesn't take away too much from the essence of the novel. I think you are a fantastic writer and with a bit of editing to the story it will be fantastic.
When I logged on today to find that your profile message was so negative I thought I best write this review asap as I hope you won't leave writing.com.
Please keep writing. your series on Damien is going to be well worth the read. I'm planning on starting Minot today. I'll let you know what I think.
This was a fantastic read and kept me well and truly entertained whilst at work.
The style of writing was easy to follow with plenty of plot turns, points of interest and a great attention to detail that was obvious in the extensive character development.
My only idea on a way to improve the story would be to have a less rushed ending. After the build up of the story to have the final war not be more impressive was a little bit of a let down. However this doesn't mean that how it is now is bad. I still thoroughly enjoyed it.
Bravo!!!
Ben
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