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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/mosef
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6 Public Reviews Given
6 Total Reviews Given
Public Reviews
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Review of Requiem  
Review by Mosef
Rated: E | (4.0)
Hello, just read your story and wanted to give a quick review. I thought the story was well written and unique. I liked the concept, kind of like the grim reaper if he was a guitarist. While reading, I wondered why you didn't name the musician but I think that made the ending more effective. I didn't see any major punctuation or grammar errors. Overall, I thought your writing was very descriptive and I enjoyed the story. Good work.
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Review of Which Man  
Review by Mosef
Rated: ASR | (3.5)
Hi, just read your story and wanted to give a quick review. As a man, I found it interesting to read a woman's perspective of admiring a stranger. Your story was insightful and I wondered where you were going with it. I found the ending a little anti-climactic. If I could make a suggestion it would be to perhaps expand the ending a little and go more into how the character felt about the contrast between her checking out someone versus her being checked out by someone, and her recognition of the difference. Overall, I like the way this was written and the detail included (the bangs over the eyes part, for example). Good job, hope to read more of your work.
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Review by Mosef
Rated: 13+ | (3.5)
Hi, just wanted to give a quick review of your poem. I liked the western theme and the language you used helped paint a nice picture. I think it had a nice rhythm and cadence to it. My only suggestions would be maybe expanding the end gunfight a little to make it more climactic, and also you refer to the main character as Jim, Jimmy, and J.T., which I think could be a little confusing for some readers, even if your intent is just to give some variety to the name. Overall, I enjoyed your poem, it told a story and I liked the touches of humor. Good work!
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