Very short. Also brings to light only one of the problems with the health care system. Medical professionals being overworked can be a VERY big problem for the patient. Thankfully you had another doctor there to take over when you no longer could.
As for grammar and the like, no problems that I noted.
Honestly, I like the general idea of it. There were some of the ideas that I found a little off. I'm not sure if it was your intention, but the main character seems a bit narcissistic, bordering on schizophrenic. If that was the idea, then you nailed it. If not, you may want to look back over it. I think it might improve the story a bit if maybe the main characters attitude toward himself and others is changed as he views the lives of the people his death affected. Maybe a better title would be After Death?
Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/spiritguide_23
All Writing.Com images are copyrighted and may not be copied / modified in any way. All other brand names & trademarks are owned by their respective companies.
Generated in 0.23 seconds at 5:36am on Apr 25, 2024 via server web1.
View Portfolio
Visit Notebook
Send Gift Points
Awards
Badges
Send Email
Community Newsfeed
General Discussion
Sponsored Items
Book of Trinkets
Static Items
Books
Groups
Interactive Stories
Audio
Campfire Creatives
Community Notes
Crossword Puzzles
Documents
Folders
Images
In & Outs
Madlibs
Photo Albums
Polls
Product Reviews
Quizzes
Survey Forms
Web Pages
Word Searches
