Very well written! It's such a great way to convey potential and spirit, and it might be my bias toward fantasy themes but I love how this sounds. I have to ask what type of music would be played for this song? Did you have a story in mind when you wrote it? I'm not sure what else you have (as this is the first of your pieces I've read), but if they have the same thoughtfulness put into them, I'm sure I'll enjoy them as well. Keep up the good work!
You've put a lot of effort into writing this romance story, that much is evident. The characters have the sense of a full backstory that while not said, is felt through the dialogue. I would have to say that the environment could use more detail in being described as it doesn't take much detail to place a setting, but without a setting the story feels a bit rushed. Also on that note for the amount of time they were sent out in the wild, I would have expected some extra hardship to build their companionship to the level of courtship, and flesh out the story, wherein you could let the characters reveal their histories and mindsets so while they learn about each other, so does the reader. Overall this story shows promise and you could do a lot with this backdrop for a story world. Good luck, and keep it up!
-C.D.X.D.
Very dark and involving. The whole time I was reading it I felt the need to hope for a better outcome within the next sentence, only to find more darkness. The tabby cat was a nice touch of humor, and in my opinion a symbol of the world's reaction to a person's inner suffering, that being distant and overall uninterested in trying to find out the source of distress. Incredibly well written, you carry the presence of a character without even mentioning a single name or person. You have a real talent for atmosphere as I could feel the loneliness of that walk, the hope of shelter, and the disappointment of being left once again alone in the rain to walk in the dark. Great work!
Very Inspiring, like something I'd want read for me after I've become a famous writer at my funeral. (sounds dark, but I mean it in the nicest way possible)
Great story, would love to see how it all pans out, how the characters met each other and what ultimately is the purpose of those creatures. Great read because the lack of introduction makes me want to find out more with each line that follows.
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