*Magnify*
SPONSORED LINKS
BY ONLINE AUTHORS
Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/tlpwigington
Review Requests: OFF
4 Public Reviews Given
4 Total Reviews Given
Public Reviews
1
1
Review of The Seeing Stone  
Review by TLPWigington
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
What an exciting read! Firstly, you have a wonderful way with language. Your descriptions of the countryside are very evocative, for example I thought this passage was particularly splendid: "He cast his gaze over the plain, the dun-colored grass rippling and swirling from the little wind spirits which danced over it, reveling in their youthful play before the sky gods sent the big winds of autumn". Though, I will temper this with a slight criticism; I think at times you overreach. The following clause, in my opinion, spoils the poetry of the former. I had a few moments like this throughout, where I found my flow jarring with a sentance that went on a little to long. Though this is just my personal preference.

The combat scenes were brutal. I cringed at your description of the leg wound. Very powerful stuff indeed. Even against the sows I was flinching!

Overall, I enjoyed the story and could not help but ponder various things as a result. Any fiction that gets me thinking is good fiction. I wonder if various things are intentional here, for example, the death of the sows compared to the death of the hunter. Did you want the reader to draw similarities between the two? I certainly was.

I think the most powerful part comes from the conflict we have as a reader. Can we trust Harok's narration? Is his magic as pure and harmless as he portrays it, or is Gundar in the right? Does his rash action represent his tribe's best interest?

I look forward to reading more of your work.
1 Reviews · *Magnify*
Page of 1 · 25 per page   < >
Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/tlpwigington