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Review of The Bides of Lirr  
Review by Toemetricist
Rated: E | (3.5)
This is very imaginative! The descriptive text is humourous and invokes curiosity about otherworldlyness. Also, particularness of details enroll curiosity. It is rough, almost a sketch, and clearly of sci-fi genre, which it delivers throughout. It seems more chapters will follow. Development of a plot, and defing the narrators role may help. More of it will be fun to read, but smoothing out some grammar and punctuation will allow me, as a reader, to pay more attention to the content; and as a reviewer, to focus feedback on narrative and plot structure.

Some examples:

The Bides themselves stand five foot tall with an octo-metric symmetry, a starfish has pento-metric symmetry. Starting from the ground up. They have four sets of lower limbs with two outward pointing knees on each. Between these were they meet

Chapter_Mexwarr's demon.
- no period needed in the title.

Chapter_Crash
- "It was whilst Semew was on one of those trips when hs family brought in Twimk to be captain, They did this after Semew walked into a burning barn to rescue a pod of hindraxd that were penned up to keep everyone safe because they were in season.

Chapter_Sibling ships
- "To help. Everyone gives up a bit their reserves food to ensure no one goes hungry until they get their agriculture up and running."



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